Yumi
by Lestaki
Summary: Graduating from High School, Yumi remains more worried about the past than hopeful for the future. But the holiday is one last chance for her to shine in love and in mahjong. She who dares, wins. Yumi x Momo and cameos.
1. Chapter 1

**Yumi: Part 1, Endings**

Hi, all. For those interested in my status, I'll update my profile. Beyond that, have a story about two good characters. I have a lot of affection for Tsuruga, the true underdogs of the series. And most of all Yumi, an ambiguously lucky character in a setting where a select few are chosen.

This is a story about lesbians and mahjong.

* * *

What we began here has already ended. It was too short. Even so, they'll continue without me.

Yes, it's inevitable, isn't it... for us to part here.

The club room was a mess, the table littered with discarded plastic cups and platters of mostly eaten food. Honestly, they didn't have to go to the trouble. I'm a little happy, though.

"Well, we're running out of time," Kanbara said, leaning back and putting her hands behind her head. "Do you have anything to say, Yumi-chin?"

"Yes," I said, leaning forwards slightly and looking at the others. Kaori, who looked like she was about to cry. Mutsuki, who was far more calm. And I could just about catch Momo, as well, at the corner of my eye. I wonder what sort of face she was making. "Even though we didn't make the break-through we hoped for this year, we've still moved forwards immeasurably. The experience we've gained is precious, and our club's something to taken a little more seriously now, which should put you in stronger position recruiting next year. If you three build on that momentum, and find some good first-years, it's no fantasy to go to the prefectural qualifiers and win."

"It'll be tough without you two, senpai," Mutsuki said quietly.

"What are you talking about?" I said cheerfully. "You're all a lot stronger now, so there's no need for us two any more. Isn't that right, Kanbara?"

Kanbara nodded. "That's how it is. We're leaving it to you three, okay?"

"Right. Leave it to us," Kaori said, smiling wanly.

"Yes," Mutsuki said. "We'll definitely reach the national tournament next year."

I nodded. "Just remember what we've taught you and you'll be fine."

There was a moment's awkward silence after that. Honestly, I'm not very good with things like this. Somehow I can never quite say the important things.

"Well, it's been fun. We should get together over the holidays, too. Don't slack off on practise just because you're away from school, though." Kanbara stood. "Let's clean up, and then get going."

And that was that, really. Before I knew it, we'd said our good-byes, and I was walking back towards the station with Kanbara. It was over.

"How are you feeling?" Kanbara asked, glancing sidelong at me.

"Well, so-so," I said, frowning. I looked up at the sky, frowning at a dark sky. We'd really stayed out late. "It's a shame. It would be have been nice to stay and see things through. I can't say I have a real sense of closure."

"Is that about mahjong, or about people?" Kanbara asked.

"I wonder," I said quietly. "Maybe neither. It's just... an unpleasant feeling. Like nothing's really ended. Things have just stopped, that's all."

"Well, I guess we'd always feel this way," Kanbara said. "This must be how parents feel when their children grow up, or something. Those kids don't need us any more, though. That is for certain."

"Yes." I sighed. "This is probably my vanity, after all. Even though I know they'll be fine, I still want to be there, just in case. As if there are things I can do they can't."

"Don't be too hard on yourself. Don't you just want to play alongside them?" Kanbara smiled. "We're too old, though. I guess we should worry about ourselves first. You're going to be playing at university, right?"

"When I can spare the time," I said.

"Going to go pro?" Kanbara asked.

"That's a little soon for me, don't you think?" I said, frowning at her. We'd joined the high street proper by this point, though there weren't that many people around any more.

"Miyanaga Teru was younger," Kanbara said.

"Don't compare me to Miyanaga Teru," I said sourly. "I don't have the experience or the power. Honestly, I doubt if there's any merit in me ever going pro. The world's too big, and has too many people like her and her sister."

"They both knew favourable conditions though," Kanbara said. "They were strong members of strong teams, so it's natural they got to flourish and establish a reputation. Don't get intimidated. They just have a head-start."

"Head-start, you say... it's more than that. They're on a different level." I closed my eyes. "I love mahjong, but I'm someone who thinks realistically. My play can only get me so far against people like that. Maybe I should take my parents' advice, and concentrate on my studies."

"Do you really think you've gone as far as you could ever go, Yumi-chin?" Kanbara said. "It'd be a shame if that was the case, but I don't think so."

"You're right. It's not as if I'm as strong as I could ever be." I sighed. "But you know what I'm saying."

"Well, yes. Momo wouldn't like to see you like this, though."

I slid my hands in the pockets of my blazer. "Enough about me. How about you?"

"I'll play because it's fun," Kanbara said. "That's all it's ever been, for me. I'll just see where life takes me. It's not like I'm the same type as you, Yumi-chin, who always over-thinks things."

"That's rather cold," I said. "I guess I do come across like that, though."

"It's good, but maybe you'd see interesting sights if you could let yourself go a little, too," Kanbara said amicably. "What about Momo?"

"She's been playing great mahjong recently," I said. "I have a lot of expectations."

"That's not what I'm asking. She'll miss you, you know," Kanbara said.

"We'll keep in touch," I said. "And she has friends now, the others are with her. She'll be fine."

Kanbara sighed. "How about you?"

"Well, it's not like I'm happy about it," I said. "This was inevitable from the start, considering the age gap. It's just..." I broke off. "Never mind."

"It's just what?" Kanbara prompted.

"Maybe if I had my time over, I'd have been a little honest," I said. "That's all. But now it's too late, after all."

I broke off as someone bumped into me from behind, shaking me. Looking back, I caught a flash of dark hair. "I'm sorry!"

That hair, and that voice. "Momo?" I asked, trying to hide my embarrassment.

Momo slid into sight. Insofar as I'd noticed her before, it was as just another person walking up the high street. "I'm sorry, senpai."

"You gave me a fright," Kanbara said. "You should have said something, Momo."

"I tried to, but I don't think you heard me," Momo said. "And you two were very busy with your conversation... it's not as if I was eavesdropping. It's just, I have to get to the station as well."

"Your brother isn't picking you up tonight?" I said, glancing at her.

She shook her head. "I said not to bother, since I'd be staying late. I'll go back by train."

"I see. So that's what it was." I turned away, feeling awkward. Considering Momo's Momo, this kind of thing has always happened from time to time. But this was even more embarrassing than usual.

"Sorry about that," Kanbara said. "We should have seen you. But it's a long way to your house from here." She stepped in front of me, smirking. "Yumi-chin, I have one last order for you, as mahjong club president."

I gave her a suspicious look. "What is it?"

"Could you walk Momo-chan back for me? I absolutely have to be back by eight, but it's so dark I won't be comfortable unless I know someone's with her. I'd take it as a favour."

"That's not necessary!" Momo said, blushing and staring at Kanbara. "I can't ask senpai to do something like that! And I'm not a child. This is what I keep telling my brother, as well."

"It's just a president's concern," Kanbara said. "It is dark, isn't it, Yumi-chin? And she has a lot further to go than us."

"Well, that is true," I admitted, looking around. It was very dark out, after all. "And my parents won't mind, either."

"It's not like I'm in danger, either," Momo said defensively. "No one can see me..." She trailed off.

"It's fine, it's fine. I'll leave it to you, Yumi-chin. My last order, okay?" Kanbara slapped me on the shoulder as we entered the station. "I'm counting on you."

She left for my usual platform, while I followed Momo. She was dead silent, so it was pretty difficult to keep track of her, but when I know she's here I can usually manage. "She's the same as ever," I said eventually. "That kind of concern is why she was a good president, though."

"You really don't have to do this, senpai," Momo said quietly.

"Well, it's a good idea," I said, slowing slightly so she walked in front of me. I was blushing slightly again. I'm actually glad, but that's something I can't say. The same as usual, this kind of tentative and awkward connection. "I'd worry as well, otherwise."

"Thank you." Momo walked down the stairs towards the platform. "I think senpai would make a good pro."

I frowned. "Maybe so. It's hard to tell." Honestly, it's hard to say to Momo. I don't hold it against her, but she also has a special gift. Her mahjong is really hard to deal with.

"The prefectural tournament was the same, right?" she said. "But we got as far as we did because of senpai."

"Not at all. Everyone played their best," I said. I paused for a second. "Are you doing anything in spring break?"

"Not at all," Momo said firmly. "I'm not doing anything special. What about you, senpai?"

"Pretty much the same," I said. "Packing for University, but apart from that nothing to speak of."

"I see," Momo said. She settled on one of the benches on the platform, looking up at me.

I sat down next to her, placing my school-bag on my lap. This is the perfect opening. I have to say it. "Maybe we should meet up," I said. "We could practise. It'd be bad to lose our form over the break."

"That would be good," Momo said. "It sounds fun."

I sighed quietly. Always mahjong. I can't think of anything but that. Never mind. It's something, I suppose. Perhaps a start.


	2. Chapter 2

**Yumi: Part 2, The Many Toyoko**

Some appearance by Hisa and Mihoko is possible. Episode 21 sold me on the pairing where I was skeptical before.

I've looked briefly over the rules but my knockledge of mahjong is quite lacking, so expect games to be painted in broad strokes. Thoughts on the level of detail and the language I should use are appreciated. I'm still feeling my way with that myself.

**

* * *

**

"So, I'm here," Momo said, turning towards me. "Thank you."

"Right." I smiled awkwardly, looking at her. Right now, I can see her clearly. "I'll call you about practise, I guess."

Momo paused for a moment, looking down. "You've come all this way. Do you want to come in, senpai? I can get you tea, at least."

I blinked, momentarily thrown. "Uh... okay."

Momo turned away, heading for the door of her house. I followed her, trying to catch her presence in the darkness. The door slid open apparently by itself. The hallway was cramped and untidy, the covered with a great number of shoes of all sizes. I knelt to take mine off, trying to calm myself. Okay, so I've never been to her house before. But there's no reason to be put off by that. It's just like talking to her in any other place. "Sorry to intrude," I said to myself. Momo hadn't said anything, though.

"Who are you?"

When I looked up, a grade-school boy with messy black hair had stopped at the bottom of the stairs, staring at me. I looked back at him. "I'm Yumi Kajiki, Momoko's senpai."

"Momo-nee's here? Oh, right..." The kid squinted at Momo, next to me, before trotting off into a side room.

"It's always a little crowded in here," Momo said quietly. She grabbed my sleeve as I stood, helping me pin-point her. "Let's go up to my room."

"What about your parents?" I asked.

"It's fine," Momo said.

The door to the adjacent room opened, and a middle aged man stepped out, followed by a dark haired woman of about the same age. "Ah, you're Momoko's friend? Pleased to meet you. We're her parents."

I bowed as they did. "My name is Yumi Kajiki. I'll be in your care."

"This is rare," Momo's mother said. "When was the last time Momoko had a friend visit, dear?"

"I'm not sure," her father said. "In any case, come and sit down."

I reluctantly followed him into the lounge, with Momo's shadow trailing slowly after me. Looking around, I saw a huge number of children of all ages. The sofas were groaning with them. The far side of the small room was taken up by a table, currently covered with mahjong tiles. Two older siblings were sitting there, a man and a woman.

"This is Momoko's friend, Yumi Kajiki," Momo's father said. "She's here to visit."

I was greeted by most of the room as I bowed my head and said "pleased to meet you", feeling rather uncomfortable.

Honestly, this situation is strange. Everyone's looking at me. But no one's really greeted Momo. When I look over my shoulder, I can't see her, either. It's pretty comfortable. "Momo?"

I felt someone grab my wrist tightly, which made me relax a little. She's here, at least. But she feels even more tense than I am. I sat next to her, uncomfortably aware I'd been dragged into something. The family was introduced in a flurry of names I could barely follow, much less remember. Thankfully, most of the children returned their attention to what they were doing after that, but the two oldest left their game aside and joined the father in sitting opposite me. Us.

"But this is really unusual," the oldest brother said, smiling at me. "You know Momoko from school, I take it?"

I nodded. "I'm her senpai from the mahjong club."

"I vaguely remember Momoko mentionning that," the sister said thoughtfully. "How is she doing? Has her game improved?"

I nodded. "She's one of our strongest players. Since the prefectural qualifiers, she's only improved."

"That's a surprise," the brother said. "I suppose we should thank you for that, Kajiki-san."

"Not at all. It's all down to her own hard work," I said carefully.

"I'm glad she's applying herself," Momo's father said. "With Momoko, we're never quite sure what she's doing. But if you say she's going well, that is reassuring."

This is... what you might call talking about someone as if they're not there. But even I can barely feel Momo's presence. She's holding my arm pretty tightly. I have to get out of her somehow.

"How about you, Kajiki-san?" the brother asked. "I assume you're good at mahjong?"

"Well, I'm not bad," I began.

"Senpai's strong," Momo said.

"I fancy myself as a pretty good player," he continued. "So if you'd be interested in a game, I'd enjoy that."

"Senpai won't lose to you, nii-san," Momo said firmly.

His eyes widened slightly. I think he actually heard that.

I looked between them, frowning thoughtfully. "Is it okay, Momo?"

"Go ahead," Momo said quietly.

How did it end up like this? I wondered about that as we prepared the table for the game. Momo isn't playing. She's just standing behind me watching. The oldest brother, the oldest sister and another older brother are my opponents. However I look at it, rather than being here to spend time with Momo I've been dragged into someone else's entertainment. But she said it was okay, so I suppose I just have to accept it. I'm not happy, though. They aren't thinking about Momo at all. So I'll just wrap this up quickly and walk away after that.

My first hand was garbage. I struggled uphill just trying to get tenpai, but it gave me a decent chance to observe the others. The oldest brother was East, and he called Riichi rapidly and won not long after that from the younger of the two brothers. It wasn't hard to tell that was a risky tile, so I think I can write that one off. But the older one was in good shape, and won the second hand as well. He looked pretty pleased with himself. I watched impassively. Just wait. Even if you're a demon, mahjong's not a game where you can win every hand.

My chance came straight after that. A good, fast hand that came together quickly. Tenpai came on when I drew a Sanpin. Discarding my Iipin, I could go into a two-sided wait with my Suupin to maximise my chances of drawing the winning tile. But looking at the older brother's discards, Iipin is a risky tile. I discarded the Suupin and went for a central wait on Ryanpin. That wasn't even a play I had to think about. "Riichi," I said calmly.

His eyes moved slightly at that. Evidently he's the type who can pressured fairly easily. And that paid off sooner than I'd thought it would. After a go-around, he discarded it. "Riichi."

"No need. Ron." I pushed open my hand. "2600."

Either he's the type who rushes to tenpai when threatened, or else he read the discards and thought it was safe since the Suupin came out. A failure of control or of perception. If I was being diplomatic, I'd hold back at this point. But I want to get back to Momo, so I'll find him out and exploit that weakness to the limit.

From that point on, I caught hold of the game. The younger brother's carelessness, the older sister's caution, the older brother's lack of control, I used them all to dominate, winning four times East and stopping anyone else from winning twice in a row. It was one-sided, and at the end of the East round, I had a massive lead. "Shall we cut this short?" I asked bluntly.

"This is pretty brutal, I'll admit," the oldest brother said. "Are you a National player?"

"Not yet," I said calmly.

"It'd be a problem if this ended here, though," Momo said quietly. "Kaishi, can I swap with you? Senpai is a pretty harsh enemy."

The younger brother blinked as she put her hand on his shoulder. "How can you do anything, Nee-san?"

"I know a lot about senpai's mahjong," Momo said, sitting down in the seat he vacated. "It's okay, right, senpai?"

"Well, go ahead if you like," I said, frowning and trying to work out her motives. "I won't hold back, of course."

"I was going to just watch, but if my family's losing this badly it's painful. And playing with senpai is fun. That's all." Momo closed her eyes.

She won't have time to use her stealth mode on me. I'm the best in our team at resisting that, and we only have a round left at the outside. But considering what I've seen so far, she won't take any time at all to use it on the other two. I should aim for a swift attack and end this before she can rebuild her points from the other two.

That's what I thought, but she didn't use it. I'd definitely have noticed it if she had. It was a straight-forwards match. Neither of us got direct hits on each other. It was tsumo wins and rons on the other two. My point advantage was overwhelming, though. There was no need for me to resort to risky measures to hit her. Momo went for big hands when she could, but she didn't manage a come-back. That's speaking with hindsight, though. At the time, I was worried, fighting hard, and enjoying myself immensely.

Playing mahjong with Momo is different, after all. No wonder it's the only thing we talk about.

"Hey, hey," the older brother said, leaning back after we'd finished. "Did you just have a lucky streak, Momoko, or what? That was pretty incredible."

"Ah." Momo flushed slightly, looking down. Her presence began to waver at the edges. "Yeah, I was lucky..."

"She wasn't lucky," I said flatly. "That's average for Momo."

"Really?" the brother said. "She's completely different from what I remember. Why didn't you say something, Momo-chan?" He blinked. "Momoko?"

Momo slid silently out of her seat, grabbing my shoulder and hiding behind me. Her grip was tense again. I don't really get this at all.

"In any case, you've had your game," I said calmly. "Excuse me for a second, okay?"

I left the lounge behind, heading out into the hall, rubbing my forehead. "That was... odd, to be honest."

"It's getting late, isn't it? I guess you need to get back to your parents," Momo said quietly.

"If you need me to go, I'll go. But if you'll let me stay, I'll stay." I managed to catch sight of her, looking at what I hoped was her face. "I still want to do what I came here to do, which is to talk to you."

Momo nodded. "Let's talk in my room."


	3. Chapter 3

**Yumi: Part 3, Conversation**

Why isn't mahjong a genre on this site? Or gambling? This is profoundly unhelpful.

**

* * *

**

Momo's room was small, and had two futons in it. One of them had a younger sister lying down on top of it, reading a book. "Hi, Momo-nee," she said, looking up and glancing at me. "Who is this?"

This was the first one who'd directly greeted Momo, as far as I could remember. "I'm Yumi. Yumi Kajiki, Momo's senpai."

The girl sat up, giving me a curious look. "You're that Yumi-senpai?"

Momo stepped sideways, her presence strengthening. "Yes. She's visiting me."

"Hmm." The girl returned to her book. "Am I in the way?"

"A little," Momo said.

"Then I'll move," she said, getting up and walking out.

"Thanks, Sayako," Momo said. She sat down on her futon, gesturing for me to do the same. "I'm sorry about everything, senpai. I hoped we'd have a more peaceful time..."

"Not at all," I said, trying to sound reassuring. She did look upset, however I looked at it. I hurriedly sat. "It's been... interesting, meeting your family. And I can't play mahjong enough. You know how I am."

Momo closed her eyes. "As you can see, I have a big family. And they're pretty forceful. Norio nii-san likes meeting new people a lot, especially if they can play mahjong. Probably... especially for other reasons as well."

"Other reasons?" I asked.

"No, never mind," Momo said, looking embarrassed. "Norio nii-san isn't even the oldest, anyway. I guess you could say we're very used to a crowded home."

"It's pretty remarkable," I said, trying to sound diplomatic. I frowned as we both fell silent for a moment. "Momo, can I ask you something?"

Momo nodded.

"Why did you-" I paused for a moment. No, asking about why her family ignores her is a little... "Why did you downplay your skill back there? It bothers me."

Mahjong. Again.

"I... don't really talk a lot with my family," Momo said. "Um. They didn't really know I even played. I don't really want to stand out."

"I see," I said, trying to work that out. "That's... well, it's the opposite of stereotype, I suppose."

Momo gave me an embarrassed look. "It's just something I'm comfortable with. I tell Sayako-chan quite a bit, though, since we sleep in this room. And I guess we're a little alike, as well."

"If you're happy, then it's fine," I said, blinking slowly. "It's a little unusual, that's all."

Momo nodded. "I guess my family is unusual. But it's okay. You praise me more than enough, senpai."

"I'm straight-forwards, that's all," I said. "You're good, though you could be better still. I don't really like pretending you're not, though it's not my business."

Momo smiled. "I know."

I frowned. Okay, something talk about. Something that isn't about mahjong.

"I still need to thank you, Yumi-senpai," Momo said quietly. "If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't have joined the club, and become friends with everyone. It's all thanks to you."

"All I did was drag you in," I said. "The rest was all you."

"That's not true." Momo closed her eyes. "That's not true at all."

"In any case, I've said enough on mahjong," I said. "Since we've come this far, we should talk about something else instead."

"I suppose so," Momo said. She opened her eyes again, looking curiously at me. "How are you feeling about going to university? It sounds tough."

"Well. I suppose I'm somewhat apprehensive, but it should be manageable," I said. "Mathematics has always been one of my strong subjects. I imagine the work will be harder but I think I'll come through okay. Socially it might be a little more difficult, though."

"Mm." Momo nodded. "I guess even you have doubts like that, senpai."

"How we met was abnormal," I said. It's a pretty humiliating memory. "I generally find talking to people troublesome. You could put it down to my detachment from a lot of popular culture, I suppose."

Momo giggled. "That's true. And you have that way of speaking, as well..."

I flushed, embarrassed. "What's wrong with how I say things? I consider it pretty normal."

"It's not important, really. You're very precise, that's all." Momo smiled. "But whether it's speaking oddly, or struggling to get along with people, I won't lose to anyone."

"I suppose so," I said. "But we're just that type of people. When we have friends, like we do now, there's no problem, is there? The others are with you, and as far as I can tell you've all been getting on well, with or without me or Kanbara."

Momo nodded. "You won't here next year, though. And senpai's still the person I like best."

I looked away to cover my embarrassment. "Well, I feel similarly. But this is natural, isn't it? Life is about meetings and partings. It's not like we'll be losing touch with each other, either."

"Mm. I know." Momo paused for a moment. "If it's senpai, I'm sure you'll be fine at university. At least you have the mahjong club, right?"

"Yes, I can join that, at least." I leaned backwards, holding myself up with my hands on the futon. "Is that all I am, I wonder? I study, I sleep, I play mahjong. Isn't that a little depressing?"

"Well, from another angle, isn't that a little amazing?" Momo said. "You've always had amazing concentration, senpai."

"Right. I'm talking to myself from the perspective of society, to a point. It's not as if I sincerely regret that, or plan to make a real effort to change. Enough about me, though." I glanced at Momo. "How about you, Momo? Do you know what you want to do with your life?"

"It's a little early, senpai," Momo said patiently. "I have two more years. Well, one, at least."

"It's good to think early and hard about these things, though," I said. "Surely you have some ideas, even if they're only alternatives to choose from?"

"Not really. Honestly, it's not something I really think about." Momo smiled. "I guess if it's senpai, you have everything planned out."

"Not really. It'd be problematic if I was too inflexible, so plan's the wrong word. I've given it some thought, though." I looked up at the low ceiling. "Accountancy is fairly profitable, and shouldn't be impossible for me. Otherwise, the civil service is an option. Academia probably wouldn't be for me, and I don't fancy ordinary office work either. And of course, somewhere in all this is mahjong pro. If I could, I'd love to. But it's not something I can risk everything on."

"That's what I thought," Momo said. "You always know what you're doing, Yumi-senpai. It's impressive."

"Well, my parents expect this much from me," I said idly. "I wonder how much of all that is just pandering to their demands."

"That sounds tough," Momo said. "I've never really had to worry about something like that."

I studied her face, trying to work out her meaning. Was she glad, or upset, coming at my situation from the opposite direction? I guess I shouldn't project. She looks happy enough, saying that. Maybe this is how Momo likes to live.

"Oh, by the way," Momo said. "Have you read that book I leant you?"

"Oh, that?" I smiled uncomfortably. "Not yet. I need to hurry up and get that back to you, don't I?"

"It doesn't matter too much," Momo said. "I've already read it, after all."

"I'll do so, anyway. Anything else wouldn't be fair." I'd forgotten about that. Too many hours spent playing online.

"It doesn't matter, really." Momo paused for a second again. "But time's flown, hasn't it? It doesn't feel so long ago we were fighting together at the tournament."

"Yes. It took me by surprise, as well." I blinked. "I guess that's always what happens, though."

Yes. Because we became accustomed to seeing the same things, and each other, every day. Falling into a kind of comforting routine that's pleasant and regular and assumed, not scary. How much of my enthusiasm was for mahjong, and how much of it was for her? Even now, I don't know. But time passes. And time's come for us. Even now, when it's too late at night and I really should say something, I can't say anything. Just a childishness, closing my eyes to the reality of the situation. Feigning ignorance so we part later instead of right now, even if it's a matter of minutes.

Momo nodded. "Honestly, it's strange. We'll struggle without you, senpai, whatever you say. Me too."

And now quiet desperation. Why? I thought I wouldn't have any regrets, just living like this. But I can't easily accept it. "We should definitely do something," I said. "Whatever you want, we should do it. I've forced you through however many hundred rounds, so it's the least I can do, isn't it?"

Momo blushed slightly. "That would be fun. Though playing with you was fun, too."

"I'll see what I can do. I'm not doing anything, after all." I frowned. "Honestly, I should have done more, mahjong and outside mahjong. I wanted you all to play the strongest opponents, but after we failed to qualify for the nationals, there's a limit to what we could do. I wanted to play strong people, as well. And we should have done other things, too, and been more social. Looking back, I wasn't as good as I could have been, in taking care of you all. That's something to regret."

Momo shook her head slightly. "Not at all... you did pleanty, senpai. Honestly, if it's someone like me, just getting me to be in the same room as other people was amazing in itself. Recruiting Kaori at the last minute, and giving our scrappy team a real shot at the other schools, it's more than anyone could expect."

"It was about your efforts as much as mine, like I said earlier." I closed my eyes, trying to hide my frustration. No, that came out wrong, again. It's not the mahjong club I'm really worried about. It's Momo and I, just that. But somehow I can never bring myself to say it. "Maybe I'm just being a perfectionist."

"Well, we do have time," Momo said. "We could ask Ryūmonbuchi or someone for another match, right? Those five are always thirsting for blood, after all."

"I suppose so," I said slowly. "Would you enjoy that?"

Momo nodded. "It's fun to play people like that. Besides, you still haven't settled things with Koromo Amae, have you? Even after our practise match with them."

"That's true," I said, my expression darkening. Koromo Amae, now there's a name with resonance. She represents all my doubts about my future in mahjong. I've seen her play twice first-hand, fought her myself once, and both times it was demonic. Honestly, she scares me. But it's also worthwhile, because of that. An all-out battle against such a strong opponent... it's something to relish. "I'd like to play her, if possible. One more time, head-on."

"Then you can play her," Momo said. "I'd like to see that, as well. I know you can beat her."

I wish I had that confidence. Last time I was barely breathing against her crushing pressure. Even so, I want to play her. "I'll ask them. Winning against her would be a good note to sign off on, however I look at it."

"Take me and I'll cheer you on," Momo said, smiling. "Good luck, senpai."

No, wait. This wasn't what I was supposed to be talking about, either. I bit my lip.

There was a knock on the door of the room. "Nee-san, can I come in?"

"Go ahead," Momo said, looking up.

The same girl as before stuck her head through the door. "It's getting late. Can I sleep?"

I checked my watch. "Ten... actually, it really is. I lost track of time."

"That's pretty bad," Momo said. "Will you be able to get back okay, senpai?"

"I'll be fine," I said, despite my inner reservations. "I'll manage. Don't worry about it." I guess I brought this on myself.

"Are you sure?" Momo looked around, apparently quite flustered. "If you'd prefer, you could stay the night... but I don't know if your parents are okay with that. And if you are..."

I smiled, despite myself. "I'll ask my parents."

Momo glanced at me, apparently surprised. "Really?"

I nodded. "If you're fine with it. Knowing them, they probably won't mind."

"Then I'll set things up. You can go to bed, Sayako-chan. Sorry about this."

"It doesn't really matter," Sayako-chan said, putting her book down on the floor. "I'll help."

"Sorry about this. I'm really imposing on you today," I said.

"It's not a problem," Momo said. "It's a special day, after all."

"Mm. I'll be back in a minute." I stepped outside, heading for a window and looking out at the night sky. And here I am, still in my school uniform. This is pretty wild, compared to how we normally act. Maybe we're both feeling the same mellow desperation. I pulled my phone out of my pocket, bringing up my house. My thumb hovered over call for a few seconds before I finally pressed it. I looked up at the waxing moon, frowning.

"_This is the Kajiki household."_

"Mother, it's me," I began.

The calm, mild voice instantly changed._ "Yumi, just where have you been? What kind of time do you call this to be out?" _

"I'm sorry, I just lost track of time," I said. "I didn't intend to worry you."

"_I don't care if you've graduated, you should still be acting responsibly. If you've been doing something reckless-"_

"It's not that," I said, trying to cut her off in mid-flow. "I attended the mahjong club's farewell party, then walked a kohai home and met her family. I don't think I've behaved irresponsibly, though my timekeeping hasn't been fantastic."

"_So you say," _mother said huffily. _"What are you doing, exactly, imposing on them at this time of night?"_

She's definitely in a cheerless mood. That doesn't bode well. "They've assured me it's fine," I said, trying to sound more confident than I felt. "In any case, it's late, so I'll be sleeping here."

Mother sighed, and didn't say anything for several seconds. _"I hope you understand exactly how worried this makes me."_

Stay calm. Getting angry won't help anything. "I know. I'm sorry. But since Momo asked me, I felt it would be impolite to refuse," I said carefully.

"_Momo? That girl?" _Mother paused for a moment. I could almost hear her scowl. _"That doesn't reassure me, Yumi. Her family is with you, I hope."_

"Of course," I said, stony-faced. "There's nothing to be worried about."

"_You know what girls her age are like. You have to be careful."_

"I'll see you tomorrow," I said bluntly. "Bye." I rang off before she could say anything more, feeling unpleasant. No matter what I do, she always looks at things that way. Even though it was so long ago, I can't make her forget that one thing.

"Senpai."

I jumped, looking over my shoulder and flushing. "Momo! How long have you been here?"

"I just got here," Momo said, fading in and looking a little offended. "Is everything okay?"

"Mm. No problem." I looked down and blinked. She'd changed out of her school uniform and was wearing navy blue pyjamas instead. Cute. However I look at it, that's cute. It's a lot different from how I'm used to seeing her.

"This is pretty embarrassing," Momo said, looking down slightly. "But sleeping in my clothes would be weird... how about senpai? I can try and borrow one of Fusako nee-san's pairs, or something."

"I'll be fine," I said, looking at her face. "I'll just take off my jacket or something. It'll be fine."

"Okay. I'm sorry this is all so short notice. I should have been more conscious of the time," Momo said.

"Not at all," I said, pushing my hair back slightly with my left hand. "The same goes for me, imposing on you even more." They really do suit her. So think about something else.

Momo shook her head. "It's fine. Anyway, we've set up. Sayako-chan will be sleeping with some of the others tonight. Getting three of us in that room would be hard."

"I suppose so. Thank her for me, okay?" I said, a little embarrassed.

Momo nodded, heading back to her room without saying anything.

I followed her, feeling a little awkward. But it was interesting as well. Before, we wouldn't even have dreamed of doing something like this. We really are out of time, aren't we?

Momo sat on her futon, giving me an awkward smile. "I'll do my teeth in a minute, and you can borrow the bathroom after that. It's best if we're quick, since the others will come up pretty soon."

"I can imagine," I said, taking off my jacket and folding it slowly. This... is probably a little dangerous, if it's me. But that's just me. I can handle it.


	4. Chapter 4

**Yumi: Part 4**

Waking up next to Yumi-senpai was a very strange experience for me. Not quite the same feeling as just waking up in the same room as Sayako-chan. I suppose that's just normal, after all. I glanced briefly at senpai as I sat up, my futon still about my waist. She was still asleep, her hair a mess around her. Senpai's always together, always controlled. I guess you could say she's the cool type. Except when she isn't, of course, but I don't see her this vulnerable very often. I like seeing different sides of her.

I shouldn't stare, though. It's strange to stare, isn't it? The last thing I want is for senpai to find me creepy. Normal people think that anyway, of course. Yumi-senpai's a little different, thankfully.

I left her to sleep some more, and went to dress in the bathroom. I've never needed much sleep, so I'm used to being an early riser. Today is no different, I guess. I fumbled with my jeans, frowning. It's not often I'm around senpai and wearing casual clothes, but I've always dressed very plainly. Maybe that's for the best, though. I'm not someone who can wear fancy or beautiful things very easily. And senpai's a level-headed person, too. I combed my hair briefly, making it as neat as I could. Ah, well. It doesn't matter, really.

When I checked my room again, Yumi-senpai was still soundly asleep. I closed the door quietly and slipped downstairs, walking softly so I wouldn't wake anyone up. There's nothing for it but to wait, I guess.

The mahjong table was left in place, just the way it had been after our last hand yesterday. Senpai's ron was open, of course. She'd passed on a better wait to target Norio nii-san directly again. It was very like her, that last play. Nii-san isn't a bad player, but senpai's more than merely good. I walked round the table, studying his hand. No-ten. I could probably have seen through that, or at least felt the danger, but I can't blame him for dealing into her hand. Carrying on, Fusako nee-san's hand was a mess. If I look closely, I think she was trying to avoid risky tiles. I guess you could put it that way if you were feeling nice, but really she was just running in circles. It's odd, since she's normally better than that. I guess she was feeling pressured by senpai, after all. And as for my hand... tenpai on a double-pon wait for 1-sou or 9-pin, a potential East baiman. Curious, I reached out and flipped over my next draw. I sighed. 1-sou. It's easy to get into thinking about what could have been at times like this. Senpai was faster, though, and that's that.

A win is a win, a loss is a loss. That can't be changed, so don't dwell on either, but use what you've learned to better prepare for future games. Senpai told us that several times over the year. It's a good lesson.

What would senpai have done, from my position? Looking back, I might have been too preoccupied with my own score. Maybe if I'd propped up Norio nii-san a little, I'd have been better placed to stop senpai's rush. I didn't really have the points to spare for that, mind...

The door opened behind me. When I looked round in puzzlement, I saw Norio nii-san walking towards me. For a moment I thought he was looking straight at me, but he walked past me, sitting down in his place and staring at the table. His eyes widened slightly as he noticed the 1-sou. "Momo-chan?" he said cautiously.

"I'm right here," I said quietly. I'd instinctively tensed up when the door opened, but now I made myself relax a little.

This time, he managed to look at me. "I didn't see you there."

"Sorry," I said automatically. I shifted nervously from foot to foot, wondering whether I could slip away.

"But it looks like I wasn't the only one to be worrying about this," Norio nii-san said. "She's pretty amazing, your senpai. Is she a famous player, or something?"

"Senpai's strong," I said nervously. I folded my left hand behind my back, grasping my right arm with it. "National-class. But she's not famous, even so, and there are many others who are similar."

"That's pretty scary. I guess the world's a big place," Norio nii-san said, leaning back in his seat and putting his hands behind his head. "So even that kind of play is just ordinary to some people?" His attention had drifted back to the table again.

"Yumi-senpai isn't just ordinary."

Norio nii-san ran an idle finger along the top of his hand. "Now I remember. You did say you'd joined the mahjong club. That's why you asked me to pick you up later than before."

I nodded awkwardly. It doesn't exactly feel like he's talking to me, somehow. I'm used to that feeling.

"I wonder why you didn't play with us before now But you probably had a reason for that, I would imagine." Norio nii-san smiled. "You should play with us from now on, though. It would be fun, I'm sure."

"I'll see," I said. "I'll be doing a lot with senpai, so it depends."

"If you say so." He reached out, touching the 1-sou. "You were pretty unlucky, weren't you? Maybe you could have turned it around with this."

"Maybe. Maybe not," I said quietly.

The door opened again. Senpai walked through, still putting on her crumpled jacket. Her purple eyes met mine. "So this is where you were..." She swallowed a yawn, trying to look composed. "Good morning."

"Good morning," I said, smiling at her and relaxing slightly. I guess even senpai looks like that in the morning. "Did you sleep well?"

"Somewhat. I was pretty shocked to find you up already." Yumi stopped next to me, folding her arms. "How about you?"

"Just normal," I said. "And I'm sorry about that. I always get up early... if you're tired, you can sleep in a little more."

"I'm fine," senpai said.

Norio nii-san stood from the table. "Well, I'll start making breakfast. Just give me a moment."

"Thank you," senpai said. "Do you want any help?"

"It's fine," nii-san said, heading towards the door. "You're a guest, after all. Just wait here with Momo-chan."

"I'm grateful. That's very kind of you." Senpai turned her attention to the table, her eyes widening slightly. "Baiman tsumo on your next draw? I'm glad I didn't hold back."

So fast. "It would have been a lucky shot," I said. "And besides, you played like that to stop that kind of luck."

"Certainly. But to an extent, you make your own luck." Senpai glanced at me. "Shall we clear this up? Or leave it like this for now?"

"Let's clear it up," I said, sitting down. "I'm done with it, I think."

"Right. I'm just being picky, I suppose," senpai said, sitting opposite me and scattering the tiles. Between us, with practised movements, we put the tiles together in a single square at the centre of the table. "So... I've been wondering about something, Momo, so, ah, would you mind if I asked a personal question? It might sound a little strange, though, since this is probably something I should know anyway."

"Go ahead," I said cautiously, feeling a little odd. This isn't usual either.

"Well, I'll do just that, then," senpai said. "Momo, what kind of films do you like?"

I blinked for a moment. That... wasn't what I expected. Not that I'm sure what I expected. "What kind of films I like?"

Senpai nodded. "Exactly. This isn't particularly in connection with anything. I'm curious."

Was senpai blushing? "Movies? I don't go the cinema very often. I like fantasy and science fiction, things like that... Ghibli films are often good, too. Beyond that, I don't really know," I said.

"I see, I see," senpai said thoughtfully. "That's interesting. I suppose romance films and things wouldn't be to your liking, even though they're popular with teenage girls."

"I'm fairly open-minded," I said. "But you're probably right."

The door opened briefly. "Good morning," one of my younger brothers said, heading for the sofa.

"Good morning," senpai said.

"Despite what people might think, I don't like horror," I said, smiling slightly. "How about you, senpai?"

"I suppose I'm in a similar situation to you," senpai said. "I don't have much exposure to modern cinema. From what I've seen, historical and war films are most interesting. I was shown several romantic films at one point, as well. They're often silly, though."

"I see. I suppose serious films are what I'd expect you to enjoy, senpai," I said, finishing pushing the tiles into place. I don't know why we're talking about this, but it's nice.

Behind me, the brother had turned on the television to morning cartoons. Several more of my siblings drifted into the room, greeting each other. The house was waking up.

"In any case, I was thinking," senpai said evasively, leaning back in her seat and folding her arms. "One of my regrets is that we haven't done that much that was unconnected to mahjong. It's a little late to lament that, though, isn't it? So I wondered whether we could do something over this holiday instead. Like a film. Perhaps."

"That would be good," I said, trying not to let my surprise show too plainly. "I'd definitely enjoy that."

Honestly, I don't know whether she means 'we' as in the club, or 'we' as in just us two. But I'll go with either, even though I'd prefer the latter.

"Then I'll see if there's anything suitable on," senpai said. "Like I said, I'll call you."

"And you're still organising the match with Koromo Amae, right?" I said. "I guess we'll be seeing each other quite a bit."

"I'm not tied up by anything else," senpai said. "If it's a problem for you, of course, then I'll reconsider."

"No. No, not at all," I said, blushing slightly. Honestly, my heart's beating, and I'm more excited than I should be. I'm glad the rest of the family can't see me.

"Then it's settled," senpai said. She sighed, closing her eyes. "That's for the best."

"Mm. Sounds fun." I'm happy, after all. Senpai doesn't have to be so nervous. Just being with senpai is really enjoyable, and no matter what it is, I'd jump at the chance to know her more. She's the first person I've really felt so close too, perhaps. But it feels awkward to say something like that to her. It's just something I prefer to leave unsaid.

Senpai opened mouth to say something more, but she was interrupted by her phone ringing. She pulled it out of her jacket, staring at it. Her lips tightened into a frown. "Sorry. I'll be right back," she said, standing and turning away. "Hello?"

She walked towards the door. I watched her go, putting my hands on my knees and frowning. I don't like it when she looks like that.

Honestly, it is that simple, really. Just that empathy with another person, something I've never really felt before now. It's made me happy, happier than I was before. But we've run out of time. I'm making a brave face so as not to worry her, and she's saying it'll be fine. But I'll be hurt, even if she isn't. I don't want to face that parting.


	5. Chapter 5

**Yumi: Part 5, Yumi's Best-Laid Plans**

You know the great thing about this pairing? No rape. No one even sexually assaults anyone, however affectionate Momo can be. It's depressing how that's something to remark on in yuri as a genre and the pairings I prefer.

* * *

I leaned forwards in my chair, frowning at the screen of my laptop. This was difficult. Was my timing bad, I wonder? I suppose since our tastes aren't precisely mainstream, it was a little naïve of me to find something totally suitable the moment I decided on going to the cinema. But it's not as if I have time to wait, either. This is what you could probably call a failure of planning. The last time I even had to think about something like this, that person always took care of everything... though knowing her, she was just winging it. Perhaps that would be a good idea, making my thinking a little more flexible. Though the comparison's imperfect, of course. It's not as if I'm going out with Momo in that sense here.

We have a very ambiguous relationship, admittedly. But it's best to let sleeping dogs lie. One way or the other, I've probably been unfair. It's too late to worry about that. All that's left is to enjoy these last few weeks. Which brings me back to this, staring at a list of films and wondering just what to do.

A second opinion might help, I suppose. I pulled out my phone, flipping it open. Momo smiling was my wallpaper. I'm such a sap, as much as I try to hide it. I found Kanbara's number and rang it. It rang for quite some time, so long I almost hung up before she answered.

"_Yumi-chin?" _She sounded a little distracted.

"Kanbara, are you busy right now?" I said. "I have something to talk about."

"_I was just sleeping. You woke me up."_

"I see. I'm sorry about that." I checked my watch. "It's eleven thirty, though."

"_Eleven thirty in a holiday, Yumi-chin. Eleven thirty in a holiday."_

"Well, certainly. Never mind, then," I said. "Sorry for waking you up."

"_It's fine. I'm awake now, Yumi-chin, so there's no point in hanging up. What is it?"_

"Well, Momo's been given to understand we'll be seeing a film some time soon," I said carefully. "But I can't see anything on that would be good. I thought you might have an opinion."

"_Wahahaha. Is this actually Yumi-chin going on a date? You're cutting things fine, aren't you?"_

"It's not a date in so many words," I said. "We're just doing something together, that's all."

"_I know you're too stubborn for me to get somewhere arguing with you. But does the film really matter that much? Just pick something interesting and make sure you hang out a lot before and afterwards. If it's Momo, that will be pleanty."_

"That's a pretty careless way to approach something," I said doubtfully, swivelling on my chair and looking around my comfortable bedroom. Kanbara's view-point is always very different from mine.

"_You're just too serious, Yumi-chin. I mean, are you really interested in going to a film, specifically?"_

"Not particularly," I said, frowning.

"_Exactly. It's going to a film with Momo that's important. She probably feels the same way. And it doesn't have to be at the cinema, either. I can lend you DVDs and you can just do it at your house, instead. That might be better."_

"Having Momo at my house would be awkward," I said, standing and moving over to my bed. "You know what my parents are like."

"_A good girl as usual. You're old enough for them to get used to this. Is really fair? And if it's Momo, they'll probably hardly notice she's there."_

"You have a point," I admitted, lying down and looking up at the ceiling. "Though you speak with a lot of authority for someone who's never gone out with anyone."

"_Wahahaha. I'm an observer, Yumi-chin, unlike you, whose always head-first into personal chaos."_

"It's not chaos," I said. "Quite the opposite, actually."

"_Do you think so? I'd disagree. Anyway, this story's started in the middle, for me. I take it you made good use of the chance I provided you?"_

"That was unnecessary," I said. I shifted, resting my head on my left hand. "Though I'm grateful, I suppose."

"_Haha. No need to thank me."_

"I didn't precisely thank you," I said. "In any case, I met her family, which was interesting. Surprisingly they're quite forceful people. Some of them, anyway."

"_That is interesting. She's been like you about her family, Yumi-chin."_

"Everyone has their own circumstances. It's not really important," I said.

"_Indeed. But still, she really does trust you, doesn't she? You do come across as a trustworthy person, Yumi-chin. That must be useful."_

"I'm normal. You're just naturally shifty, Kanbara," I said, smiling. "That must be difficult."

"_Hey, hey. That hurts, you know. It's not what expect from a good girl."_

"That's true. I'm someone with a greater sense of dignity, as well." I shift slightly. "On another note, Kanbara, there was one more thing I wanted to talk about. I decided to challenge Koromo Amae again."

"_Oh? That's interesting. Is that for Tsuruga Academy, or for you, Yumi-chin?" _

"Mostly my own selfishness. Just like I promised on that day, I want to fight her again. I want to beat her." I closed my eyes. "Momo's been encouraging me, as well. She says I still haven't settled things with Koromo."

"_I see, I see. Good for you, Yumi-chin. I'd like to see that match as well."_

"When I think about in the cold light of day, my confidence wanes, though," I said. "It's not as if someone can forget playing with her. It's frightening. And just remembering that, I've started to doubt myself. Not just my ability. In the practise match, did I really put Kaori fifth because of strategy? Or was I just making an excuse for running away from Koromo? I don't know, when I ask myself that."

"_Hmm. You can still get like this, after all, right? I guess you can't say something like that to Momo, though, since you're her beloved senpai."_

"To a point," I admitted uncomfortably.

"_You're always self-conscious, even when you act cool," _Kanbara said, sounding amused. _"Especially to Momo. Anyway, it's only natural to be scared of someone like Koromo. But it's also stupid to be awed by that feeling. I know you're better than that."_

"True," I said. "It's just an ordinary match, as well. But it's still a match I don't want to lose."

"_Because you're greedy, Yumi-chin."_

"It's not just that," I said. "It's not greedy to want to win. I'm just worried I'll lose to her without doing anything, as if she's a chosen one and I'm not. That kind of defeat isn't ordinary."

"_Or is it the reverse? Do you want to beat her to prove you're also one of the chosen?" _Kanbara laughed again. _"From my perspective, you're pretty alarmingly good as well."_

That reminds me of the day before yesterday, playing with Momo and her family. They said we were amazing, didn't they? Is that a matter of point of view? I frowned. "If you're trying to say that there's a level where Koromo Amae is nothing special, I'd hardly take that as reassurance. Quite the opposite."

"_Not at all. And I wasn't saying you were greedy for victory, either. You shouldn't jump to conclusions, Yumi-chin."_

"If you say so," I said, sighing. She's always hard to pin down.

"_You just want to be able to consider yourself among the best. I wouldn't know why, but I admire it. The others, too."_

"That's a given," I said. "If you fence off certain people and say 'I'll never be better than them', you're just limiting yourself. It's not certain you'll be able to beat them just because you try, though. But tenacity creates a possibility. I think we've made sure the whole club has that frame of mind."

"_Certainly. But aren't you doing that yourself, saying Koromo Amae is beyond your reach?" _Kanbara paused for a moment. _"You need to win to convince yourself that's not true."_

"It's not quite that simple, or quite that dramatic," I said. "I'll admit there might be an element of that, though. It's not as if I've forgotten our first match."

"_Like I said, Yumi-chin, you're greedy. Wanting to win against Ryumonbuchi's demon. If you step away from your own sense of seriousness, isn't that funny?"_

I might have been offended, but I caught her tone. "Maybe it is. You're right. Approaching this with too serious a frame of mind would be bad. I need to be humble and determined. That's the mindset of a challenger, isn't it?"

"_Well said! Just like we did at the tournament. But be greedy, as well. A challenger's always greedy." _

Yes, that's right. If I worry too much about my past and my future, and see it as some kind of test of my ability, of course my nerve will fail. Only an idiot stakes the course of their life on one match. It's not a battle for anything. It's a battle fought for its own sake. "Thanks, Kanbara. I'm glad I talked to you."

"_Wahahaha. If I couldn't do this much, where would I be, as a club president and as a friend?" _She sounded very pleased with herself. _"Knock that girl out, Yumi-chin. I'll come watch if I can."_

"I will," I said. "I told her as much, as well."

"_Try that with Momo, as well. Throw away your own seriousness and unnecessary things, and you two might be a little more at ease."_

"This and that are different matters," I said. "And that moment's gone. Even if I was cowardly then... it'd be unfair of me now to be too reckless."

"_That's what I'm saying's unnecessary. I give up, though, since you're so hopeless. You'll only come up with a hundred excuses, right?"_

I sighed. "There's no point in us discussing it, no. I'll be happy to borrow your DVDs, though."

"_Yes, fine. I'll bring them round later. But first I need to eat breakfast, you know. Or, rather, lunch."_

"I'll see you later, then," I said. "Thank you for everything, as usual."

"_That's just my job... well, it's not any more, is it? Take care."_

She hung up. I relaxed, frowning thoughtfully. Kanbara's probably necessary for someone like me, after all. I'm not so arrogant as to think I'm always right in my assumptions and calculations. So I like to go along with her advice, when I can. It's for the best more often than not. I glanced at Momo's picture again. Just this one thing, though, no matter how much she says my answer's always been the same. Am I being strong or stubborn, brave or cowardly? Even if you think you've made a decision for sound reasons, you may be deluding yourself. I thought I'd learned that lesson well. I thought Kanbara would know, as well, since she was there for me when I was badly hurt.

Momo has pretty eyes. Even I don't get to see them very often, but they're pleasant when I do get to see them. And a small part of me, a low part of me, enjoys the fact that they're something only I get to see. That I'm the closest person to her.

I closed my phone, returning it to my pocket. I'm sure I'm not mistaken. I'm sure this is what's best for her. I know heartbreak is worse than lingering regrets.


	6. Chapter 6

**Yumi: Part 6**

I must confess that compared to the anime, this fanfiction has a dearth of Momo hugging Yumi randomly. I tried to improve things here, but we'll need to import much more before the month is out to break even. Perhaps I could export some of the stockpile of angst I'm building up in return to maximise comparative advantage.

I've been researching an essay on economic history, okay? Don't look at me like that.

**

* * *

**

I scrutinised the cloud of people walking out of the station, trying to catch sight of Momo's short black hair. She even mailed me to say she'd caught this train. No matter how it might look at a superficial glance, she has to be here somewhere.

Warm arms wrapped themselves around my stomach from behind. "Senpai."

I jumped compulsively, my heart pounding. "Momo!"

"Oh. Was that a bit sudden?" Momo resolved herself from thin air, her weight pushing on my back from behind. "Sorry, senpai."

"Anyway, not here," I said weakly.

"No one can see me," Momo said placidly.

"They can see me." I sighed with relief as Momo detached herself, turning to face her. "In any case, you're still amazing. Even though I knew you were coming, I couldn't see you at all."

"I cheated a little this time," Momo said. "I deliberately took the long way round, and hid myself as much as I could."

"I see. Well, never mind." I smiled, trying not to look nervous. I have no reason to be nervous. "Shall we go?"

"Right." Momo followed me, staying very close.

She's in a good mood, I think. That's good. Maybe she was nervous last time since her family was involved? Well, ironically enough, this time my family might be involved, and so I'm nervous. I should get that out of the way first. "I should mention something before we get too far," I said, looking sidelong at her.

"Oh?" Momo asked, giving me a quizzical look.

She's cute in casual clothes, as well. The black shirt suits her. I blinked, finding my thread again. "My parents... as you've probably inferred, they're somewhat difficult people. And my mother's settled on the idea that I'm too close to you, so she might be problematic. It shouldn't be a major problem. I won't let her say anything inappropriate to you, and in any case she does have a strong sense of manners."

"I see." Momo smiled. "If that's all, it's no real problem, is it? She won't even notice I'm there."

"Well, there is that approach," I said slowly. "But that would be rather unfair to you, wouldn't it?"

"Not at all. I'm used to it, after all." Momo looked down at her feet, still smiling. "I don't want to trouble you. And I'm not very good with uncomfortable situations, either. So I'm happy to hide, if you'll let me."

"If that's the case, that's fine," I said, frowning thoughtfully.

"In any case, I'm a little excited," Momo said.

"That's a little worrying," I said. "My house isn't really very exciting, however I look at it."

Momo laughed. "Not that. Not exactly."

I shrugged, smiling slightly. "I hope you have fun, whatever it is you mean. Regardless, it's not too far from here. My house is close to the station."

Sure enough, we arrived in a few minutes. Momo stopped for a moment outside, looking up. "It's... well, big."

"To an extent," I said, feeling a little embarrassed. I opened the front door, stepping in and slipping off my shoes. "I'm back."

"Welcome back," my mother called from the kitchen, sounding disinterested.

Momo slipped off her shoes, kneeling and picking them up with her left hand. "I'll hide these in your room, okay?"

"Ah, I see." I caught myself before I said anything else, walking down the spacious corridor and up the stairs. Momo followed in my footsteps, her footfalls almost imperceptible. I opened the door to my room, stepping inside.

Momo stepped through, looking around silently. Her expression was still bright.

I closed the door behind us, leaning against it. "This makes me a little uncomfortable," I admitted quietly.

"It's not as if your mother would be happy if she knew I was here," Momo said, kneeling and slipping her shoes under my bed. "This is more peaceful."

"Well, that's certainly true," I said, heading for my favourite chair. "We should be okay from here. I'll talk quietly, even so."

Momo nodded, perching on my bed. "That's best. It's okay, though. I am very hard to notice."

"That's certainly true," I said. "And you're very good at taking care of the rest, it would seem. I didn't think of the shoes, myself."

"I'm used to thinking about this sort of thing," Momo said. "It's not as if my lack of presence is just natural, you know."

"I see. I suppose that's true, after all." I swivelled to face her, frowning thoughtfully. "Can I ask something, Momo?"

Momo nodded. "Of course. Do you want to know what kind of food I like?"

I smiled at that. "No, not right now, though I'm interested. I just wondered, and stop me if I'm being intrusive... but are you happy with your current self?"

"Hmm. That's another hard question." Momo put both hands on the covers of my bed, closing her eyes. "I suppose I'm quite comfortable with my current self. But maybe that's not the same as being happy."

I nodded. "If I was evasive, that'd be pretty unfair. So I'll be straight-forwards. I've always felt I should help you come out of your shell, so to speak. But it's also patronising for me to think that way, and in any case, I'm not a very social person myself. I suppose I've just been wondering how you feel at this point, now I'm going away."

"I thought it would be something like that." Momo looked at me, her hands gripping the covers slightly. "I feel like I've gained a lot. Compared to how I used to be, I'm living a more social life. I do have friends. But it's not really as if I've changed myself. It's a little hard to change after all this time."

"That's true," I said. "Though you're often fine. You don't get shy with me, do you? And the rest of the club, as well."

"Because you're friends. I feel safe with you four. Senpai especially." Momo shrugged. "I don't feel that way with other people. I'm not really interested in them, either. That's what hasn't changed."

"I suppose that makes sense," I said. I paused for a moment, trying to work out what to say next. I suppose I should just be natural. "Honestly, I'm somewhat similar. Socialising isn't something that comes easily to me, either. A lot of the time, I'm using an aloof façade to cover up that fact. Perhaps that's like your stealth mode. A defensive mechanism."

"Really?" Momo said. "It doesn't seem that way to me."

"Then it's a good defensive mechanism."

"Hmm. I see." Momo leaned forwards, slightly. "So, are you happy with your current self, senpai?"

I laughed, feeling slightly embaressed. I hadn't expected that. "That's fair, I suppose. I don't know either."

"So even you get like that," Momo said thoughtfully.

"Well, I'm not very social after, all. I used to be confident, but as I've grown I've became increasingly aware of my own deficiencies. And also the kind of adversity you can encounter." I closed my eyes, folding my arms. "If you leave yourself open, that can hurt a lot. Unbearably so. It's only naïve to assume everyone is benevolent or honest, and that they all regard you well. But it's also problematic if you can't communicate as well as you'd like, and I'm probably losing something by seeking safety. Even so, like you, I'm happy with the friends I have now."

"That's fine, isn't it?" Momo said. "I've always thought that's the most important thing."

It feels like this conversation's gone in the complete opposite direction from what I was aiming for. I didn't want to talk about myself. I opened my eyes, shrugging my shoulders slightly. "Since I'm going to university, though, it could be a bit of a problem. I'll manage, though. Despite all that, I'm still more worried about you."

Momo looked down, her facial expression concealed by her hair. "Thank you. That thought is enough in itself. But honestly, I am worried. You are going away, after all. And you were the one who found me. So I'm a little scared. I don't want to go back to how I felt back then. Even if I'm not very social, it's not as if I want to be alone."

"You won't be alone," I said, trying to sound reassuring. "You'll have Kaori and Tsuyama with you. People will join the club as well. And we won't lose contact, either. We can easily keep in touch."

"I know. I know all that. Even so, I'm still afraid. I wonder why that is." Momo breathed out, her cheeks flushed. "You're going to be very far away, senpai."

I swallowed, my chest aching slightly. I don't know whether that's for her sad face, or for my painful memories. "I know what that feels like. And I am afraid. But people can't move forwards if they keep thinking like that. At the least, you have to be more positive about it."

"You're right, of course." Momo smiled weakly. "I don't want to hold you back, either. I'll be fine, I guess."

I turned my chair sideways, placing my left hand on the box where I kept my mahjong set. "Not at all. I should be able to say something more positive, but I can't. Distance is a powerful force."

"That's true," Momo said quietly. "But I won't forget you, even so."

"I don't like saying that. It's too much like something ending," I said. I didn't say anything for several seconds. "Momo, did I ever tell you when I started playing mahjong?"

"I don't think so," Momo said after a moment. I suppose she was surprised by the change of topic.

"Three years ago, more or less. Pretty much exactly as I came into high school." I closed my eyes. "That feels like very long ago."

"Really? I'd assumed you'd been playing for years," Momo said.

"I hadn't touched the game before that point. I was very young and very bored, and I didn't come into Tsuruga having any strong desire to join a club. And I was somewhat dragged into the mahjong club despite those half-hearted feelings. The third-year was very forceful, and I complained to anyone who would listen about it." I smiled wanly. "I was a little happy, though. That person's enthusiasm was a little infectious, and I suppose I felt wanted. Senpai had a knack for making people feel they were wanted."

"I'm... a little surprised," Momo said. "I thought you'd be just like you are now."

"I wasn't very wise at that point in time," I said. To be frank, I wasn't sure why I was raising this old story now. I wasn't really sure what point I was trying to make, either. I suppose I just wanted to say something I hadn't been able to say before. Maybe that was all. "You could say I liked that person, in time. And senpai..." I broke off. My fingers tapped the dark brown wood box. "In any case, everything ended for us when senpai graduated. I thought that wasn't the case. I thought we'd be able to maintain that bond, but I was mistaken, and in the end I only got hurt. It wasn't a matter of someone being in the wrong. It was just how things were. That's all. I learned a lot from the experience."

"That's rather sad," Momo said quietly. "I'm sorry."

"It's ancient history, really," I said, forcing another smile. "I don't know why I'm raising it at all." I swivelled on my chair, glancing at her. "But you and I are different from that. We're close friends who should be able to stay in touch over that distance. That way, no one will get hurt. So that's something I'm glad about."

Momo nodded slowly. "You're right."

I closed my eyes, exhaling slowly. That's right. That's how it should be. I've always clung to safety since then and this is no different, but at the least, I won't hurt her. I won't make her cry. Even I can manage that much, which is more than senpai ever tried to do.

"What kind of person was your senpai?" Momo asked curiously.

I opened my eyes, frowning thoughtfully. "Senpai... I suppose they weren't anything like me. They were social and gentle, but extremely perceptive. They could see through anything and anyone just with a single glance. I couldn't hide anything from senpai. And senpai wasn't very humble, either, which was something I discovered for myself. And unlike me, senpai didn't take anything seriously, except maybe herself." I stopped, swallowing uncomfortably. "Honestly, I shouldn't do this. Talking about the past. I didn't bring you here for this." I blinked rapidly. "I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry," Momo said. "I shouldn't have pried."

"Not at all. I raised this to begin with." I rubbed my forehead briefly, frowning. Great. I've killed the cheerful mood we had earlier. Just what was I trying to achieve? I always end up feeling terrible even thinking about this, and I doubt if she's enjoying it either.

"In any case, this is a nice room," Momo said quietly. "It looks very comfortable."

"It is nice," I said. "I'm glad I have the club, since if I didn't I'd probably never leave." I blinked slowly, pulling myself together. "In any case, Kanbara's lent me lots of different things. She has a surprisingly large collection of DVDs. We can probably find something interesting there."

Momo nodded slowly, just watching me.

I left my chair and knelt, grabbing the bag Kanbara had dropped off and picking it up awkwardly. Then I walked across the room and sat on the bed next to Momo, trying to think of something else to say. "Do you have any preferences?"

Momo was silent for a few more seconds. Then she leaned forwards, wrapping her hands around the back of my neck. "It's unfair. It must have hurt. It must hurt, partings."

I blushed. She's warm. "I'm fine. It was a long time ago." I placed my hand on her left arm, planning to gently pull her away. But in the end, I didn't. "It's really not a big deal. I don't need coddling."

"Mm." Momo paused. "Maybe I do, though."

I didn't say anything in reply to that. I just stayed like that for a while, holding her arm as she held me. Once again, trying to cover myself, all I end up doing is obliging her to open herself and then using that opening to hide my own feelings. My own weaknesses. This fear.

It's hard to have self-confidence when I'm always like that.


	7. Chapter 7

**Yumi: Part 7, Ryumonbuchi**

Sorry I'm late. 's document uploader was being troublesome. In any case, I hope you guys like mahjong. Because I like mahjong a lot, or at the least, ridiculous anime mahjong.

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_Yumi Kajiki,_

_I hope you are in good health. The weather has been pleasant this spring, has it not? My friends and I have very much enjoyed this holiday so far, and sincerely wish the same for you and your friends._

_In regards to your challenge, we would be glad to accept. Koromo has assured me that she would be happy to play against you at any time. However, we must make a request of you. I believe it would be far more interesting for both parties if you could bring as much of your team as possible. Considering you've graduated, it would not be remarkable if your friends resented the intrusion on their hard-earned time of rest, but I sincerely hope at least one of them would be willing to accompany you and play against us. In addition, we have taken to playing with a few house rules at my mansion. I would be delighted if you could agree to such terms, but if you would prefer to play in a conventional way, I would naturally understand. This is a matter we can discuss on the agreed date._

_As a tentative suggestion, this Saturday at one o'clock would be convenient for us, and hopefully yourself as well. The next week would be more difficult, since we have a previous engagement at that point in time. I have attached the address to my mansion. Simply ring the doorbell, and you will be escorted to us._

_I hope these conditions are agreeable to you._

_Yours sincerely,_

_Touka Ryumonbuchi_

_I've been waiting! I'll test your mettle willingly, to see if you've forgotten the promise you made to me on that day! - Koromo_

I stood outside the huge gates of the Ryumonbuchi estate, folding my arms and feeling rather uncomfortable. I was half expecting a servant to come along and move me along for loitering. Touka Ryūmonbuchi and her associates really do live in a different world. I'd always known this was the case, but simply looking on the tall metal gates and the huge grassy expanse of the gardens beyond brings that fact home in a very concrete way. It's hard to believe people like this exist.

I jumped when someone touched me on the shoulder. "Good afternoon, senpai." Momo resolved into sight, smiling cheerfully.

"Ah, Momo." I breathed out, gathering myself again. "Good afternoon."

"Sorry. I tried to approach conspicuously, but I think you were lost in your own thoughts."

"No, it's fine," I said. "Much better than not knowing you were there. I'm glad you could come, anyway. Thanks."

Momo shook her head. "I have many reasons to be here, too, you know. I enjoy mahjong as well, after all."

I smiled. "I suppose so. I appreciate it, anyway."

This is the first time I've seen her since she visited my house, though we've chatted online. I was afraid things would be awkward, but she's as bright as ever, and I'm just as glad to see her. I just worry too much, I suppose. No harm done.

"Are we waiting for anyone else?" Momo asked.

"Kanbara said she'd come," I said. "I'm not sure about the other two. Three should be plenty, regardless. One other was all we were asked for."

Momo nodded. "In any case, I'm a little excited to see you play Koromo again."

"Games with her are never going to be boring, though they can be one-sided," I said dryly. "Honestly, I'm more than a little nervous."

"I'll be supporting you," Momo said. "You've practised a lot since then. I'm sure you'll win."

"Thanks." I smiled. "Don't worry. Now the day's actually come, I'm also more than a little excited. No matter what, facing Koromo means going up against a genuinely strong opponent. I'm looking forwards to that just as much as I'm worried about it."

"Wahahaha. That's the spirit!" Kanbara waved as I looked up, approaching in casual clothes with Kaori and Mutsuki in tow. "We're going to knock them dead this time."

"Good afternoon," Kaori said, smiling nervously.

"Good afternoon," Mutsuki said, looking a little more confident. "This should be interesting."

I tried not to look surprised. "Everyone, thank you for coming. I thought you'd be sick of mahjong by now."

"Looks like they're not," Kanbara said as the other two shook their heads. "Anyway, Yumi-chin, do you want to do your usual thing?"

I blinked for a moment before catching her meaning. "Right. This will be our third time playing Ryumonbuchi. The only thing we've confirmed is that I'll be playing Koromo Amae, but it's pretty certain they want other games as well. It's an excellent chance for you three to test your growth since the last practise match and confirm an ideal strategy for next year. For Kanbara and I, it's a chance to go out with a bang. All of us here are ready and able to face them. If we stay calm and play our own mahjong we have a good chance at winning."

Kanbara nodded. "Exactly. And let's all have fun, as well."

I nodded at the others. This is good for my confidence, having all of them here. We began the year with hardly any club left to speak of, but what we have now is something far more than that. Mutsuki, Momo and Kaori, all of them now have the same dedication as Kanbara and I. Whether that's anything to do with us, or whether it's all them, I'm still moved. "Let's go." I turned and rang the doorbell.

Instantly, a man dressed in perfect black clothes appeared in front of us. He glanced at us and smiled. "Ah. You must be Ojou-sama's guests. Please allow me to escort you."

I stared at him. I wasn't paying attention, but I don't think I missed him walking up the driveway. I caught myself after a few seconds as he pressed a button to open the gate. "Thank you very much." I bowed. "We'll be in your care."

"Not at all. Please come in."

We followed him up the driveway, which was quite the walk. Looking around, the gardens really were spectacular. They must be very hard to maintain.

"I take it back," Momo said quietly. "Your house is pretty large, senpai, but this is a really big house."

I nodded silently. It really was.

The butler pushed open the wide, wooden double-doors, stepping into a large hallway. "You may keep, or take off your shoes, as you wish. Please hand them to the maid."

Yes, there was a maid, in a French-style uniform. I tried very hard not to stare at her. She was only a few years older than me. The stone floor looked cold, so I kept my shoes. After that, we walked up a huge flight of stairs and down a hallway, arriving at the other side of the house. The butler knocked just once. "Ojou-sama, your guests have arrived."

"Let them in, Hagiyoshi," a voice commanded clearly from within.

The butler opened the door, stepping aside and letting us enter. We walked into a huge sitting room. The far wall was dominated by vast windows looking out over the back of the garden. Several large wooden coffee tables were in to the left side, with comfortable, aristocratic sofas with fine wooden frames on either side. Several mahjong tables were set up on the right side, surrounded by comfortable chairs. Touka Ryumonbuchi sat on an arm-chair at the end of the coffee table, her arms resting easily on either side of her. Most of the rest of the team were sitting on the sofas, all of them looking at us and smiling. "We were waiting," the blonde woman said, smiling with a trace of humour. "Welcome to my house."

I bowed my head with the rest of my team. "Thank you for allowing us to visit, especially since my challenge was rude and sudden. We will be in your care."

"Don't be that formal," Jun Inoue said, smiling amicably. "You'll only bloat Touka's head up even more."

"What did you say?" Ryumonbuchi-san snapped.

"Now, now," Hajime Kunihiro said, raising her hands. "It's okay, Touka. We're in front of guests, after all. It's good to make them feel more comfortable."

"You're making a scene," Tomoki Sawamura said stiffly, typing on a notebook.

Ryumonbuchi-san sniffed, turning her attention back to us. "In any case, you can rest easy. I do dislike being too formal. As you can say, Koromo isn't here right now. She's asleep. So for now, why don't you all sit down and drink tea with us?"

She's really different in person from how she comes across in writing, that much is for sure. "Then we'll do just that," I said evenly. I can handle this kind of atmosphere, but the others are probably much less at ease. Momo especially. I need to provide a confident lead. I walked across the room, sitting in the middle of the empty sofa. "Is Amae-san ill? If this is a bad time, there's no need to go ahead."

"She's just sleeping too much, as usual," Inoue-san said bluntly. "I tried to drag her out of bed, but she almost bit me. She'll be up eventually."

"Honestly," Ryumonbuchi-san said, frowning. "We picked an afternoon time to try and avert this problem. I'm afraid it's a bad habit of hers."

"I see," I said. "Provided she's still willing, that's fine." Momo had settled very close to me, while the others sat on either side of Kanbara on the second sofa. "Perhaps this would be a good chance to explain your house rules?"

Ryumonbuchi-san nodded, while her butler began to pour tea for us all. "Good idea. We play an enormous number of games amongst ourselves. However, a huge number of our games with Koromo tend to devolve into any three of us against her. I found that distasteful, so I invented some rules to avert that a little. Tomoki, explain."

"For three weeks and two days now we have been playing a form of two against two mahjong based on previous experiments," Tomoki-san said without looking up at us. "During the course of a match, all four players possess their own 30,000 points, as usual. However, they begin in two pairs and the final scoring is the sum of the points of both players, with 60,000 subtracted from that score. There is no bonus for coming top. Beyond this scoring and the understanding that this is a team situation, there are no special provisions for team play. You are not permitted to look at your partner's hand or communicate important information verbally. If you deal into your partner's hand, you pay the full amount of points. A partner's tsumo will still take a share of points from you. A partner's win will end your time as dealer. And so on."

"This mahjong relies on insight into a partner's hand," Ryumonbuchi-san said, smiling and looking rather pleased with herself. "Your strategic opinions are deepened, and you can no longer simply concentrate on your own position. It helps seal Koromo's haitei raoyue, as well. Drowning the table is less than helpful when her own ally is also going under."

I wonder about that. From the play I saw at the tournament, Koromo also possesses a startling insight. And when Kaori played her, Koromo targeted Kaori's hand exactly, as well. I find it hard to believe she's really held back by something this simple. I nodded, even so. "That's reasonable. I don't have any personal objections."

"Sounds fun," Kanbara said.

The butler silently placed cups of tea in front of us. Five cups in all.

"I'm glad. Oh, and one more thing. It's a fringe case, but since Koromo's here it's worth noting. If your ally loses all of her points, then naturally you also lose at that moment." Ryumonbuchi-san leaned forwards slightly. "At the risk of repeating myself, individual play isn't enough. True team strength is needed."

"There's no one here who would lose all their points," I said firmly. "Even if the enemy is Amae-san."

"That's quite the confidence you have there," Ryumonbuchi-san said. "Shall we test that? Once we're done with tea, we should play while we wait for Koromo to stir. The numbers are just right for two matches, two on two each."

I frowned. "There are five of us here." Momo gripped my arm tightly.

"There is?" Ryumonbuchi-san, looking puzzled for a moment. Then comprehension dawned. "Ah, that girl... I'd certainly like to play her again."

Momo gripped my arm tightly.

"I'll sit this out," I said. "All the others can play."

"That's fine, Yumi-chin," Kanbara said. "I'll sit out, so you play. You can't tell me you don't want to."

I frowned. "Is that really okay?"

Kanbara laughed. "It's fine. I want to see you all play one last time. That's all."

"Then it's settled," I said. "Momo and I. Kaori and Mutsuki."

"I'll play with Touka," Kunihiro-san said firmly, folding her arms. Her chains rested on her lap. "That's final."

"Then I'll partner with Tomoki," Inoue-san said. "I'd like to play you, Kajiki-san. I still owe you for our last match, after all."

"No, we'll play her here. I have unfinished business with the invisible girl, and I want to play Kajiki-san, as well," Ryumonbuchi-san said firmly. "Your chance will come later, Jun."

"Stingy," Inoue-san said, frowning. "Ah, well. I guess I'll take this chance to beat the girl who won a yakuman off you, Touka."

Ryumonbuchi-san gritted her teeth. "That was bad luck, that's all! It hardly even counts!"

"Really?" Inoue-san said. "Then what about all your lucky tsumo wins? Have they stopped counting now?"

"That's ancient history," Kunihiro-san said hurriedly, raising her hands. "Touka's improved since then. Besides, she can play the others later."

I sipped my tea, frowning thoughtfully. Honestly, I can't work out if these people are on good or bad terms with each other. At the very least, it stops them from being intimidating.

"They remind me of my family," Momo said quietly.

I nodded slightly. "I see. I take your point. They're better at mahjong, though."

Ryumonbuchi-san gave me a strange look, but I ignored her. For now, we could relax like this. Soon enough, we'd be playing each other as enemies. We can think what we like of each other in every other way, just as long as we can play good mahjong. And I certainly intend to win.


	8. Chapter 8

**Yumi: Part 8, Human Element  
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This wasn't easy. Feedback is especially valued here since if I've written yuri romance a few times, I certainly haven't done this before.

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"Now, then," Ryūmonbuchi-san said, glancing at her opening hand briefly before looking straight at me. "Let's begin, shall we?"

"Agreed," I said evenly. Ryūmonbuchi-san is East. Ideally, I want to win here and prevent her from building up momentum. Luckily, this hand looks like it will develop pretty fast. The more I control the flow, the faster Momo will disappear. She's getting better and better and that... and she's my secret weapon here, so I'll go for it right from the start.

The first few draws were quite useful for me, and my hand began to take shape. So far so good.

Kunihiro-san drew and instantly placed her tile down in front of her.

"Chi!" Ryūmonbuchi-san slammed the tiles home at the side of table, smirking.

I frowned slightly. Calling this early? That's abnormal. Ryumonbuchi-san is a theory player, so it's even more unexpected coming from her.

The next turn, Kunihiro-san took in the tile she drew and passed out an East wind.

"Pon!" Ryūmonbuchi-san called again, watching me intensely. A triple of East wind, double wind. That's painful.

My next draw was no use at all. It doesn't matter, though. Even if I'm falling behind in terms of forming my hand, I'm still closed and I'm pretty sure I can keep it that way. Between her discards and her calls, it's all too easy to read her hand. It looks pretty big, but she'll have to get a tsumo or a win off Kunihiro-san. This one hand's worth of good luck isn't unusual for her, but it will turn in the end.

Two turns later, Kunihiro-san dealt out a tile Ryūmonbuchi-san called on again. "Pon! Riichi!" Ryūmonbuchi-san threw the stick down, discarding a tile sideways in front of her. "Here I go!"

I managed to get tenpai two turns later. It's a two-sided wait on a closed hand. No need to shy away from taking her on head-on. "Riichi."

Kunihiro-san dealt a safe tile again, then Ryūmonbuchi-san drew. Her expression of glee deepened. "Tsumo!" She flipped her hand open. "2000 all."

I passed over the points with a neutral expression. I'm instantly a long way down on her, that hurts. But that's Ryūmonbuchi-san's luck for you. You have to absorb damage like that from time to time.

But in the fourth turn of the next hand, the same thing happened again. Kunihiro-san dealt a tile she drew that let Ryūmonbuchi-san call instantly. That worried me. I've found one rule helpful in my time playing mahjong. One time is a coincidence. Two times, no matter how unlikely, is a pattern. And when I stop focusing on Ryūmonbuchi-san, Kunihiro-san looks quietly pleased with herself. Is this on purpose? Can she read into Ryūmonbuchi-san's hand so much she can do that deliberately? It's too early in the game for the discards to provide clear information. That shouldn't be possible.

But it happened in the sixth turn, as well. Pon on three 9 pins, then Ryūmonbuchi-san drew another 9-pin. "Kan!" She added the tile to her tri, drawing from the dead wall. She smirked at her draw, sliding it into her hand and discarding another tile. "Riichi!"

Ryūmonbuchi-san did say something like that, these rules being a test of insight. But while Kunihiro-san is strong, she's not like Inoue-san or Koromo, people whose insight can be said to be unnatural. If that's the case, how is she doing this? I wouldn't worry, but Ryumonbuchi-san's luck means she'll be able to make winning hands even when open.

Momo coughed slightly as she discarded her draw, a 4-suu. My eyes widened slightly. "Pon!" I slid the tiles home on my side of the table, discarding one of my useless tiles. No time to worry about closed or open, right now I need speed.

Kunihiro-san glanced sidelong at Momo, frowning slightly, before taking her new draw into her hand and discarding another tile.

Ryūmonbuchi-san hesitated for a moment before opening her hand. "Ron. 2400."

I bit my lip. Was that also deliberate? It's possible Kunihiro-san wants to protect Ryūmonbuchi-san's time as dealer, but it's not as if my hand looked threatening or complete. Or is it Momo, rather than my hand, they were threatened by? That doesn't make sense either... unless it was something else Momo was doing.

"It's okay, senpai," Momo said, smiling faintly. "I'll support you."

My eyes widened slightly as I glanced at her. Yes, that's also a possibility. An explanation for how Kunihiro-san can deal into Ryūmonbuchi-san's hand flawlessly. By playing the same opponent many hundred times, you grow to understand a team-mate's mahjong in a way that's impossible for others. Not just their tiles and their play-style, but their body language... players strongly immersed in real-world mahjong can manipulate that. I taught Momo that lesson myself. To do it this perfectly might require an even closer insight than that of a team-mate, but regardless, it's possible. Further, I've been approaching this game from a conventional mindset. I can't confirm it without seeing Kunihiro-san's hand on an exhaustive draw, but it's probable she isn't trying to win for herself at all. She can use otherwise useful tiles to support Ryūmonbuchi-san. Compared to my one hand, the opposition could be said to have two... being left flat-footed is an inevitable result of that. Thanks to Momo, I've realised that just in time.

I put the last tiles of my opening hand into place, glancing at it briefly. It didn't look like a bad hand, and it's shape was good for my purposes. I nodded. "I'm counting on you, Momo."

"However much you conspire, the result will be the same!" Ryūmonbuchi-san said firmly, dealing her first tile.

I smiled as Momo dealt a Chun. "Pon." I brought the tiles home, glancing across at our two opponents. Now that was pure luck, not insight, almost certainly. But a little luck is necessary to step forwards.

Ryūmonbuchi-san called one of Kunihiro-san's tiles on the third draw. "Chi!"

No matter. We're just getting started. Momo drew and dealt one I could call on the fifth draw. "Chi."

Kunihiro-san's sixth tile also let Ryūmonbuchi-san call. "Pon!"

On my eighth, I completed another tri with my own draw, three 7-wans. Normally I'd keep this hidden, but right now I need to maximise Momo's information. "Pon." Nearly there. I dealt the spare tile.

"Pon," Ryūmonbuchi-san said firmly, taking my tile to finish the tri.

Momo dealt the missing 7-wan.

"Kan." I drew from the dead-wall, getting nothing useful. But my hand came together the next turn on its own. "Riichi!"

Kunihiro-san's next draw let Ryūmonbuchi-san call her final meld. "Chi! Riichi!" She grinned, apparently exhilarated. "It's a head-on battle, Yumi Kajiki!"

It's a matter of luck, however I look at it. She's really quite rude in person, but I suppose she doesn't mean anything by it. I just nodded.

As it turned out, this time fortune favoured me first. "Tsumo," I declared, pushing the tiles I had left open. "1000/2000."

"Just as I'd expect of Kajiki-san and Toyoko-san, you're quick to understand," Kunihiro-san said amicably.

"Thanks for that compliment," I said calmly. Honestly, I'm upset I didn't understand this much sooner.

"Just understanding won't help you, though," Ryūmonbuchi-san said. "The true battle's just beginning."

I narrowed my eyes. Yes, that's certainly true, though not in the way she intends. I won't let this simply be a slugging match where we both race as pairs for tenpai using calls. Now I understand the rules of the game, I'll aim for the openings they create.

Since Momo was East now, I did my best to support her in turn. But even for me, it's difficult to read into Momo's hand and discards, since everything she does is shrouded in her personal lack of presence. Kunihiro-san was in fine form, too, pushing Ryūmonbuchi-san to an early tsumo, 500/1000.

It's a shame to waste Momo's turn at East, but I was next. I frowned thoughtfully as I completed my initial hand. 7200 between myself and Ryūmonbuchi-san. That was rough. But this hand looked promising. With it, I might have a chance to make my next move.

Initially we followed the same pattern as before, a race to call on tiles. But my chance came on the ninth turn, with another of Momo's deals. "Kan." I slid the tiles into place, drawing from the dead-wall. Lucky. My hand was in good shape on a double-pon wait, 8-pin and 2-sou. Normally I'd throw this 9-pin away and go for the bigger hand, but not this time. I dealt an 8-pin after a single glance at Ryūmonbuchi-san's hand. "Riichi."

There is a rationality that exists beyond calculations of probability.

A turn later, Kunihiro-san dealt the 7-pin straight after drawing it. "Pon!" Ryūmonbuchi-san said instantly.

That is the human element. "I'm afraid not. Ron." I pushed my hand open calmly. "2400."

Ryūmonbuchi-san stared at my hand, looking displeased for the first time all match. If it was her, she would most likely have kept the 8-pin. But Kunihiro-san didn't look especially shocked. She's someone who plays Koromo Amae regularly. Of course she has the tenacity to keep fighting even after being burned once. That's why I'll pursue that second shot as fast as I can, while this loss is still fresh in her mind. If I'm forceful and lucky, I'll be able to create that illusion in her. The illusion that the if the first time was coincidence, the second time is a pattern.

I began to build my wall again. That hand was significant for one more reason. I was still quite a way below Ryūmonbuchi-san, but Kunihiro-san was trailing significantly. The actual difference between our two teams was slight. If we kept pressing here, we could easily take the lead.

Our luck wasn't good in the next hand, though. Kunihiro-san continued to feed Ryūmonbuchi-san, whose hand developed faster than mine. Her hand was big, as well. Pon on 9-wan, Pon on Hatsu. This could be bad. Things got even worse when Kunihiro-san dealt a Dora, 3-pin. "Pon!" Ryūmonbuchi-san said cheerfully. "Riichi!"

Not good. I absolutely had to win here, even with this small hand. I glanced sidelong at Momo, but she couldn't deal anything useful. My tile, though... I drew a 2-pin. This is risky, but I don't have any choice but to go for it. I dealt a 1-pin from my pair, sliding the 2-pin into place. It's a hell wait, but it's not completely blind of me. Ryūmonbuchi-san is greedy. It's all meaningless if I don't get tenpai, though.

Luckily, we managed to get through the enemy rounds without anything happening. I breathed out slightly, relieved. If it's Ryūmonbuchi-san, one-shot tsumo is more common than it has any right to be.

Momo dealt her draw instantly. My heart leapt. I was waiting for that. "Chi!" I threw out my last useless tile sideways. "Riichi."

Two turns later, Kunihiro-san drew something, glancing at me and frowning. I looked back evenly. Will you come? Or will you bail here?

She dealt it. 3-pin.

I opened my hand before Ryūmonbuchi-san could declare kan. "Ron, Dora 1. That will be 2900."

"How could you play like that?" Ryūmonbuchi-san said, looking incensed. "Is robbing a kan your special move or something?"

"I don't have anything like that," I said, frowning taking the points I'd won. "I just got lucky, that's all." It'd have been great if Ryūmonbuchi-san had dealt it, and it was actually robbing a kan, but this was lucky enough in itself. It was also reliant on their weaknesses. Whether Kunihiro-san played the odds, or wanted to make Ryūmonbuchi-san's big hand even bigger, or had sensed my challenge and felt the need to go in fighting against that, I don't know. But those ways of thinking aren't enough.

Now I'm leading Ryūmonbuchi-san, just about. But in terms of team scores, we lead by a long way now. My direct hits are telling, and Kunihiro-san is lagging behind.

Momo beamed at me. Ryūmonbuchi-san looked petulant. But Kunihiro-san held my gaze when I turned to her, her eyes determined. I'd hoped to crush her spirit, but it looks like I achieved the opposite effect. Now she's looking at me rather than Ryūmonbuchi-san, and her eyes are more alive than I've seen so far. "Touka, leave this next hand to me."

Ryūmonbuchi-san smiled again. "Ah. I'm counting on you, Hajime."

I smiled as I began to form my hand. So you're finally awake? If she's coming at me again, that's all the better. I came here because I wanted to fight strong opponents. That feeling of wildness, that thrill of taking someone head-on and trusting in your skill, luck and intuition... that's what all of us seek here. I slid my last tiles into place. So come.

* * *

**Extra: Mahjong Notes**

That was the last hand I intend to show of this match, since this is hard to write, Koromo is still to come and you're probably all here for the lesbians anyway. I may have made mistakes, but I've done my best to combine accuracy to the letter of the rules with flagrant violation of their normal outcome in the true spirit of the series. I'll be explaining some of my underlying work here so the knowledgeable can correct me and the new can understand a little more.

The match begins with Touka East, Momo South, Yumi West and Hajime North. I contrived this position so Yumi could call chi on Momo's tiles and Touka could call chi on Hajime's tiles.

Yumi's flashier moves here rely on the fact that winning takes precedence over calling on tiles discarded, something she also used to rob Saki's kan in the anime.

Hands are approximated rather than exactly worked out. That would be too much work, and in any case would be tedious to read.

Too much information? Not enough? I'm open to suggestions on format, since this is all very new to me.


	9. Chapter 9

**Yumi: Part 9, Girls Love**

Thanks for all the feedback, and apologies for my mistakes. I had a vague suspicion about the riichi rule, and the need for yaku. It's inevitable that I'll make mistakes, sadly, and why I've decided to keep mahjong as the minority of the content here. It's best not to over-stretch myself.

I am very fond of Hajime and Touka. I doubt I'll have many excuses to keep them around, but it's not for a lack of will.

**

* * *

**

I smiled as the tile I was waiting for came into my hand. This was the one, wasn't it, senpai? I placed it down in front of me.

"Ron." Senpai pushed her hand open, her expression even as usual. "1600. That's all."

The loud blonde girl fell forwards slightly, her expression dazed. "How is it possible for me to come in last?"

"It was a team game, Touka," the bondage girl said, putting a hand on the loud girl's shoulder. "I should have done a better job supporting you, and avoided dealing into Kajiki-san's hand so much."

"You were more than enough, Hajime. But this disgrace..." She lifted up her head, pointing abruptly at me. "It was you again, for a start! How is it Kajiki-san can see your discards normally and I can't? Isn't that just unnatural?"

"I don't know," Yumi-senpai said calmly. "Maybe you just don't pay very much attention."

The blonde girl glowered, while the other one simply laughed uncomfortably.

"What's wrong, Touka?" The manly girl approached our table, folding her arms in amusement. "Wasn't it this your big chance to avenge your previous humiliation?"

"Shut up," the blonde girl said indignantly. "You lost to Kajiki-san as well, after all! I remember that quite clearly!"

"Wahaha. Good work, Yumi-chin, Momo," Kanbara-senpai said cheerfully. "You two make a good team, after all."

"I'm here to challenge Koromo Amae," senpai said. "It would be problematic if I lost before she'd even woken up." She swivelled in her chair, glancing at the second table. "How did it go, Kaori, Mutsuki?"

"We're sorry, senpai," Kaori said quietly.

"It was pretty difficult," Mutsuki admitted. "In the end we couldn't keep up."

"That's fine," Yumi-senpai said. "I know you both gave it your best. The lessons learned are what is most important."

"Exactly. You both played good mahjong," Kanbara-senpai said cheerfully.

"And it's not as if we weren't worried about that girl's crazy hands, either," the manly girl said cheerfully. "Isn't that right, Tomoki?"

"Unnatural luck," the boring girl said, already typing on her computer again. "Just like before."

I smiled slightly. As ever, Kaori-senpai is pretty amazing. Even if she's less powerful than senpai and I now, she can already do something neither of us could ever do, after all.

"In any case, Koromo's been given more than enough time," the blonde girl said, folding her arms and sniffing. "Jun, drag her down, even if you have to grab her ankles. You have my permission."

"Okay. Leave it to me." She turned and left, closing the door behind her.

"Well, let's sit down again," the blonde girl said. "I'll thank you for a good match."

"Not at all. It was a pleasure to play with you," Yumi-senpai said, standing as well.

I followed her back to the sofa, latching onto her arm again. It was a little scary, being in a room with people I didn't know very well, but I felt safe close to her. Looking around, it was more interesting than scary. The boring girl had already sat in her place, still typing, while the loud blonde girl sat in her chair at the head of the table. This time, the bondage girl sat on the arm of the blonde girl's chair, looking completely at home. It felt like she was looking at me, as well, which made me feel very self-conscious. It's not as if she can see me, though. She dealt into my hand just like any normal person would.

"In any case, I'll have a chance to wipe this defeat clean from the slate sooner or later," the blonde girl said, folding her arms. "You'll all be attending the prefectural tournament this year, won't you? We'll meet in battle again there!"

"That's true," Yumi-senpai said. "Though I won't be there, of course."

The blonde girl blinked. "You won't be? I was counting on that."

"Because she's graduated Touka," the bondage girl said patiently. "If you recall, she challenged us for that reason, right?"

"Oh. Of course," the blonde girl said, frowning for a moment. "I knew that, of course. But I was hoping Kajiki-san would tag along to watch over her kohai, and something might be arranged. That would be responsible, don't think?"

I smirked. Honestly, she's surprisingly fast-witted, even if she's covering up her own mistakes.

"If I can, I just might," Yumi-senpai said. "Though it might be best for me to leave these girls to their own devices, rather than interfering."

"In any case, we're jealous," Kanbara-senpai said. "Having a team that's all the same age must be nice. You five are really comrades in arms."

"That's a given," the blonde girl said, grinning spiritedly. "I'm glad you understand that! This is a bond not just anyone knows."

"Team spirit," the boring girl said quietly. I was surprised she said anything.

"Well, even if we say that, it feels like you guys have it in pleanty," bondage girl said, smiling cheerfully. She was still looking this way. Probably at senpai, though. "In that last game in particular... Toyoko-san and Kajiki-san were pretty in-sync."

"Thank you," Yumi-senpai said. "I'd say the same about you two."

Kanbara laughed. "Ahaha. I don't know about you two, but with Yumi-chin and Momo, it's just them being in their own world again."

I blushed, pouting. "Are you mocking us?"

"Ah, you said something," bondage girl said, looking at me and smiling.

"You can hear me?" I said, a little surprised.

"Sort of. It's hard to pin you down, Toyoko-san, but I was pretty sure you'd be close to Kajiki-san," bondage girl said. "You are close to her. Emotionally, I mean. I guess that's why you can play that way."

"Now you're making fun of me as well," I said, frowning uncomfortably. She's really quite brash.

"Not at all! Being close to the person she likes is a maiden's dream!" bondage girl said, smiling with an alarming sincerity. "It's a feeling I understand very well."

The blonde girl blushed furiously. "Hajime! You'll embarrass the guests, you know."

"Well, if they say so, I'll stop," bondage girl said reasonably. "I don't see anything to be ashamed of, though. You're important to me, after all, Touka."

"Girls love," the boring girl said flatly. Actually, she might be laughing at us all behind that deadpan face. It wouldn't be surprise me.

I didn't think it would be possible for the blonde girl to blush more than she already was, but she managed it somehow. It wasn't as if she looked displeased, though. I blushed a little myself. Why was it, I wonder? I felt a little jealous of that expression on her face. I just wondered what senpai would look like if she made a face like that. That's all.

Unexpectedly, I guess she's the uke.

"Just like last time, you're all interesting," Kanbara-senpai said amicably. "I admire straight-forwards people. It's a little nostalgic."

"Just what part of that is nostalgic?" Yumi-senpai said, half-embaressed and half-suspicious.

"Wahaha. Nothing, nothing. I was just talking to myself."

"What did I miss? Touka's making that syrupy face again," the manly girl said from behind. She walked towards, carrying a petite blonde girl with both her arms, bridal-style. Bunny ears flopped from a head of blonde hair.

"I can say with confidence and assurance that I have never once in my time on this fair earth made a face that could be described as syrupy!" the blonde uke said furiously.

"Yes, yes," the manly girl said patiently. She knelt by an open space on one of the sofas, placing Koromo Amae there. "Hey, wake up. They're guests."

"Shut up," Koromo sleepily. "My blood runs thin right now. I'm gathering my energy to meet this battle."

"However I look at it, you're just trying to nap again," the manly girl said, folding her arms and sitting down next to the girl.

Bondage seme laughed. "Sorry about this. She's pretty like this, most of the time."

"Honestly, it's not a bearing fitting for a relative of mine," the blonde uke said, folding her arms. "And after Kajiki-san came all this way, as well."

"I'm doing this because it's Kajiki-san, though," Koromo said. She rolled over on the sofa, opening her eyes while remaining lying down. Blue moons glittered as they regarded Yumi-senpai forcefully. "I won't be like I was on the day we made that promise, but I'm still gathering myself to my limits. I won't be like when I took down the glasses girl, either."

"That was pleanty strong enough." Yumi-senpai closed her eyes. "I'm glad, all the same. I'm planning to face you, as strong as you can be right now. So please don't hold back."

"Koromo never holds back like ordinary people," Koromo said. She yawned widely. "But it's hard to stir at day. It's not as if I'm too sleepy, it's just you're all too awake."

"You and Touka both have a knack for nonsense," the manly girl said, rubbing Koromo's head.

"Don't pet me!" Koromo squirmed.

I'd expected blonde uke to say something to that, but unexpectedly she was smiling slightly. I suppose even she has her gentle side.

But even so, it's astounding, every time I see her. Koromo Amae is an infamous name, but it's almost impossible to associate that ferocity with her appearance and childishness away from the table. Whether it's Yumi-senpai or Kaori, though, that appearance is always belied by reality. Or are these two different realities both correct? I don't understand her at all.

"Jun, you'll be partnered with Koromo, right?" bondage uke said.

"Right. Honestly, whether Koromo's blood is flowing or not doesn't matter," the manly girl said firmly. "I'll take control of the flow myself. You won't be able to use the strategy you relied on last time, Kajiki-san. Not when it's Koromo and I together."

"I'll see that for myself," Yumi-senpai said. "And Momo and I are a pretty ferocious combination as well, I can assure you."

"So it is Toyoko-san as well, then," bondage girl said. "I thought so. This should be a good match."

"Agreed. That's fine, right, Momo?" senpai said, looking across at me.

I nodded, flushing slightly. "Leave it to me." Even if the opponent's Koromo Amae, when I've disappeared, I'll have the stage all to myself... she's different from boobs-girl, after all.

"That's good. A concord amongst men, a pact for those who go unto the breach." Koromo pushed herself up, smiling deeply. "Koromo's blood begins to stir. If it is you, Kajiki-san, I am sure we can have fun even when I use my full power. A battle until the end, that is the heart-racing mahjong Koromo most desires."

"I'll give it to you," Yumi-senpai said. "And I'll win this time."

Honestly, I'm a little scared. This presence, those flashing eyes... Koromo Amae really is different from anyone else here. But I'm excited, as well. This side of senpai, this determination and strength, I haven't seen it since the prefectural tournament. I want to see it with my own eyes. The mahjong Yumi-senpai can play at times like this. And I want to play to my heart's content, staying by her side as she does that. This is what we share.

"You made me wait for that promise." Koromo stood, smirking. "Jun, we're going now. Don't fall behind."

"Who do you think I am?" the manly girl said, standing and ruffling Koromo's hair again.

Yumi-chin nodded, standing as well. "Okay. Let's go, Momo." She offered me her hand.

I flushed slightly as I took it, standing. Right. No matter what happens to us from now on... and no matter what senpai experienced alone in the past... just for this moment, this is our bond. I won't waste that.

* * *

**Omake: In A Strange Land 1**

_Yumi panted for breath, sweat pouring down her face. She summoned a dozen more blades, looking down at her exhausted opponents._

_"To think that I- the Dragon Princess- could lose to a commoner such as yourself," the blonde warrior said, grasping her spear with exhausted hands. "I refuse to accept it!"_

_"No. Their strength is real," the black-haired chain user said, broken links scattered around her. "I'm sorry, Touka-sama. I've failed you."_

_A shadow flickered behind Yumi. "What do we do, Thousand Swords?" the Veil of Darkness said quietly. "Though we've made it this far, we've taken heavy casualties-"_

_She was cut off by a flash of light. Yumi's eyes widened in shock as her swords were snatched from mid-air. "What was that? This presence-"_

_"I'll congratulate you on your nerve," a voice said coldly from behind her. Purple hands crushed the swords into pieces. "To defeat my knights is no mean feat. I'd expect no less from Thousand Swords. But this is as far as you go." Magic rushed outwards from the blonde girl clad in ragged white clothes, driving the two warriors back instinctively. The girl turned, smiling widely. "Be honoured to fall before the Great Red Moon, Koromo Amae!"_

_Dozens of purple tendrils erupted from her back, racing towards the two warriors. Both leapt away as the ground beneath their feet was struck and crumbled into dust. Yumi's eyes widened as she felt another warrior materialise behind them, striking downwards with a massive sword. "Momo!"_

_An explosion of white light swallowed them in an instant.  
_


	10. Chapter 10

**Yumi: Part 10, Dark Designs**

Urk. No more mahjong chapters for me, for a while. But I'm still glad I made the attempt, since it's something important to the characters.

**

* * *

**

I sat down, collecting myself again. I'm glad we had that break. Even for me, playing two games in a row would be difficult. But now it's time to focus.

"This should be interesting," Kanbara said cheerfully. "We're all cheering for you two."

"Thanks," I said absently. Inoue-san looks like she's fired up, but I can't see anything in Koromo right now. She's just sitting there, swinging her legs and watching me. In both the matches I've seen her play, Koromo's held back for a few hands before coming in violently... I need to make use of the fact I'm starting East to build up points and brace for that attack. But Momo's West. I can't count on her to complete my sequences by letting me call Chi this time.

I brought the last tiles of my starting hand into place. It looked like it would fast. That was just as well, because the other half is Inoue-san. And she's no push-over, either.

"Ready to go?" Inoue-san said, grinning.

I nodded, glancing around the table. All ready. "Right. Here I go."

My early draws were good, and I managed tenpai on my seventh draw. Two-sided wait on 4-sou and 7-sou. So far so good.

Inoue-san called on Momo's next tile. "Chi!" She looked straight at me, smirking.

Aren't you brimming with confidence? I frowned when my turn came. Ordinary, you'd think a wait like this would be good enough. How can a two-sided wait be sealed with just one call? But that's a trap. If it's this person, you have to throw away such unnecessary feelings, and throw away your tenpai as well. I placed the 3-san I drew on top of my hand. My fingers slid between the 5-sou and the 6-sou. I'm trusting myself to chance... but there are less discarded 5-sou, as well. I dealt the 6-sou, frowning back at Inoue-san.

She leaned back, smiling. It's not as if she wasn't expecting this. I imagine her team-mates use this strategy a lot on her, as well. And no matter what, my advance is slowed.

I frowned as I drew a second 3-san, discarding the 5-sou. Not yet. I'm not finished yet, but if you've locked your course, so will I. "Riichi." Another showdown.

It didn't even get to her turn. Momo silently dealt the 3-san, instead. I pushed my hand open. "Ron. 3900." I catch Momo's eye and smiled. Maybe we're not moving forwards just yet, but we've protected East for now. It is possible to escape Inoue-san's control of the flow.

"Not bad. But not sufficient, either," Koromo said softly.

I ignored her. It's not as if I'd get anywhere playing like she does. My luck was worse in the next hand, though. I was approaching tenpai, but I didn't have a yaku. I frowned, touching my 1-pin. It'd mean changing direction, but it looked like I'd have to go for End-less. I dealt it.

"Ron." Koromo opened her hand. "1300."

My eyes widened slightly. Koromo winning so early, and with such a cheap hand? That was uncharacteristic of her. I dismissed it mentally as I handed the points over. Losing East hurt, but only an idiot would expect everything to go their way against Koromo Amae. Don't mind it.

That was complacent. For her next three turns, Koromo east, she won with small hands targeted straight at Momo. The fourth was a Baiman Momo dealt into. I swallowed. Koromo has taken an overwhelming lead this fast, but that's not even the greatest damage our side's taken. "Are you okay, Momo?"

"I'm fine," Momo said quietly. "Don't worry about me, senpai."

She was looking down, even so. She's never played against Koromo, and on top of that, she's used to being unusually resistant to the enemy winning on her tiles. There's no way this hasn't hurt her confidence.

"I have a good feeling, Jun," Koromo said, looking up and smiling. "Let's do that."

"You're not letting me have any fun at all," Inoue-san complained. She smirked.

My hand started in an ugly way, but even so, I managed to get tenpai.

Inoue-san called soon after that. "Pon!"

I frowned. Koromo's silent again, which worries me. But all I can do is push forwards. It took a lot of time, but I managed to get tenpai again. Honestly, I'm more surprised Koromo hasn't already won. Momo... I can probably can't count on her right now. I have to do this myself.

"Chi."

I gritted my teeth in frustration. Another of Inoue-san's calls... this is hopeless. It was only when Koromo called that I realised what was happening. We were running out of time, and she'd locked her course. Koromo Amae would be drawing the last tile. And even if I tried to call or change course with my hand, nothing was coming together. And in the final turn, the execution blade swung down.

Koromo pushed her hand open with her final draw. "Haitei Rayoue. 2000 all."

I closed my eyes, gritting my teeth. Using Inoue-san's ability to disrupt enemy players in order to stretch out the game until Koromo can reach her haitei raoyue. It's a powerful example of team play. Next round, I'll try and stop it. But how? My draws were bad, and Inoue-san was in good condition. I gritted my teeth. This incredible feeling of adversity... like you're trying to swim in quicksand... at this rate, things will end without me doing anything at all.

"Excuse me, Inoue-san. There's no need to draw." Momo looked up, smiling. "I believe I clearly said tsumo, after all. 1000 all."

Inoue-san blinked, her expression shocked. "I see..."

"Again with that!" Ryumonbuchi-san said, sounding annoyed.

I sighed with relief, feeling foolish. I should be ashamed of myself, forgetting about her. Momo isn't someone who folds so easily. But a small, strongly closed hand... it's understandable that would evade the sight of even Inoue-san and Koromo, if it's Momo. That's not what's important, though. While I was wavering and doubting myself and her, she was moving forwards, calmly and in silence. I need to calm down. "Thank you," I said, glancing at her.

"Yumi-senpai?" Momo asked quietly.

"It's nothing." I lowered my hands, opening my eyes. "I'm feeling better now. Let's go for it."

"I still hate being a child," Koromo muttered. "But it's too early for celebration amongst sisters-in-arms. You won't turn us back with a single check."

Momo managed to win several times East off Inoue-san, taking some of her points back. Then Koromo hit us with a big tsumo, practically putting us back where we started. Koromo's only stronger now in terms of points, and Inoue-san's attention is rooted firmly on Momo now. She won't be able to disappear easily.

That can be turned to our advantage, though. This next hand of mine is suitable for another line of attack I've been considering. I glanced sidelong at Momo. "We're attacking here. All-out."

"Sorry, but we won't let you," Inoue-san said, placing her first tile.

Our opponent is Koromo, so we need speed. I watched the board carefully as my hand developed. Koromo's ability to target someone is pretty similar mine, though she might well be using something different from my reading of the discards to do it. But I can read her hand, to an extent. Enough to keep me safe for now. For the rest, I'm counting on Momo.

"Riichi." Momo placed the stick in front of her, her expression controlled. This time, both of them were watching her carefully, though.

Inoue-san took her new draw into her hand, looking slightly relieved. "Kan!" She formed a closed kan, drawing and discarding another tile and flipping over a new Dora.

I drew my next tile, sliding into my hand. Don't think Momo's the only danger. I discarded a stray 3-pin. It's here. Tenpai on a 7-pairs hand, Dora 2. My wait on 1-sou is aimed at Koromo.

Koromo glanced warily between us, taking more than a second on her discard for perhaps the first time all match. She played a 7-wan instead.

"Pon!" Inoue-san slid the tiles home, glancing at me.

I discarded the 1-sou on my turn, keeping my new 7-sou. With this hand, it's no effort at all to switch up my wait. It's always going to be a bad wait, though... I'm counting on my insight and my luck to aim for their tiles, since I can't count on tsumo when the game's going this badly for us.

Koromo dealt a 1-sou, her expression huffy. Just as I thought, her insight forced her to bail until it was safe. But if it's her, she's one away from tenpai or in tenpai with those draws.

"Riichi!" Inoue-san discarded a tile sideways, her expression controlled. Looks like she's not expecting to be able to call again.

My eyes narrowed as I drew it. 8-wan. I was waiting for this. The other tile isolated when you discarded that safe 7-wan instead of my 1-sou might have been this. Inoue-san called on that 7-wan and the other one is something Momo discarded long ago. One 9-wan is discarded. Two of them are right here, in my hand. But a 6-wan... one of those is unaccounted for. The other problem is this 7-sou. I placed my hand on it, staring across at her. If Koromo is in tenpai, if the flow of the game really is dancing to her tune, she'll win here. I can't do what Miyanaga-san did. I can't call madly and blow up a hand to ridiculous proportions in an instant. Targeting the opponent is my mahjong. And that's what I'm putting on the line here.

There's one other thing I know about Koromo. She'll accept challenges head-on.

I placed the 7-sou sideways in front of me, gritting my teeth. But nothing came. "Riichi!" Koromo knows I'm in tenpai. I can only go all out, clearly declaring that challenge.

Koromo held my gaze for a moment, her expression darkening. "Your conspiracy is sinister indeed. But I'll end it here. You are not her." She placed her draw on top of her hand, sliding her fingers across and stopping at a single tile. "This will pass." She flipped it open, pushing it into place amongst her discards.

"It won't pass," I said, trying to keep my face composed despite my leaping heart. "Ron. Riichi, ippatsu, Seven Pairs, Dora 2. 12,000."

Koromo held my gaze for a moment longer, then broke into a smile. "This is interesting. Very interesting! I was sure that would pass." She reached out, taking the points sticks and handing them to me. "Was that a miracle? Or was that your boon, a grace?"

"I wouldn't know," I said evenly, taking the points. "I'd just call it luck." That was a big win. If we keep pushing here, we can turn things around and take a big lead.

"Wahaha. This is what Yumi-chin can do when she goes with her intuition," Kanbara said cheerfully. "Not bad, is it?"

"It was a lucky fluke," Ryumonbuchi-san said calmly. "Koromo's counter-attack will be much more severe."

"Koromo agrees," the girl said, beaming. Her blue eyes were intense. "Miracles aren't enough. You must show grace, the grace to win again and again, just as I will. Only then can you make Koromo enjoy the excitement of a close-fought match, a sincere struggle, such as I desire."

I nodded silently. She's right, of course. I'll just have to win again and again. I managed to win a small hand as East but just like before, Koromo won with a small hand, then won again just like that. This pattern... I saw some of it in Kaori's game with Koromo, but not at the finals. Her mahjong's mellowed. But just like tempering metal, that's only made her stronger than she was before. She's not merely relying on her insight and luck now.

With her third hand east, I was preoccupied throwing off Inoue-san's strong attack, and before I knew it we were sliding into the pit. Inoue-san was watching Momo carefully, as well. Before I knew it, there was nowhere to run. I tried to dealing into Inoue-san's hand on the last turn, but inevitably she didn't take the bait. Koromo scooped the moon from the water. "Tsumo. Riichi, ippatsu, toi-toi, Dora 3." She smiled contentedly. "Haitei raoyue! 6000 all."

She's relying on Inoue-san's ability to force our hands to a standstill right now, but even so. This kind of massive comeback is Koromo Amae, her truly terrifying ability. In an instant, we're incredibly far behind again.

Her condition's good right now. It's not wise to raise a hand to her. Inoue-san, on the other hand... throwing out calls isn't very safe, especially against me. I switched up my hand several times in the next round, managing to get back on target just as she moved to complete her hand and winning off the tile that flowed out. "Ron. 3200."

"Again with seven pairs?" Ryumonbuchi-san said, sounding almost offended.

I thought I could get a big hand next round, but it just wouldn't come together, even changing up my waits. Koromo's probably developing fast already, and she's clearly watching my every move. I won't get the chance for another direct hit. I frowned as a 3-pin came out. Not that. I was waiting on the 5-pin.

"Ron," Momo said quietly. "Riichi, ippatsu, 3 quads, endless. 12000, please."

My eyes widened. Not just the concealed kan... I'd even missed the riichi. Koromo looked even more shocked. If it was her, she'd definitely expect to notice a hand that big. But what I can barely manage by changing waits and chasing her down, Momo can do naturally. That's Momo's ability. And I know what comes next... she has the stage all to herself.

Momo won three times with smaller hands, securing our position. With that said, it wasn't easy for us either. I was on the offensive every round, trying to deflect and pressure the other two with my own hands.

In Momo's fourth bonus hand, I aimed squarely at Koromo, getting 7-pairs again and switching up several times to mount pressure on her. Momo's hand came together as well. Just like before, by pressuring her with dangerous hands from both sides, even Koromo won't be able to evade without throwing her hand away.

"Tsumo. 2000/4000." Inoue-san smiled. "Ignore me and you'll be in a world of hurt, you know."

I gritted my teeth. Considering how far behind she was, I'd assumed I could leave her alone. They've made a huge amount of ground now, and even though they're still behind, Inoue-san's dealer on this last round and any bonus rounds. We have to end it here.

Koromo played aggressively as well, though. It was all I could do to develop my hand while avoiding hers. In the end, I had to take a risk.

"Ron. 3900." Inoue-san leaned forwards to take my points. "You two are pretty impressive. It's been a long time since Koromo and I have been pushed this much. But this is as far as that goes."

Another turn-around. The worst possible situation. Most likely, next round Koromo would go for a quick hand and Jun would dealt into it for their win. But my new hand looked slow. The points I need to get aren't trivial, either. Is this really as far as I go? After coming this close? No, that doesn't matter right now. I glanced at Koromo, who looked at me with innocent blue eyes and smiled. I'll just do whatever I can, until the end. Believing in and aiming for that one moment, that one chance. Even if I can't win here, I can avoid losing.

Koromo's developing fast. I'm beginning to get an image of her hand, but if I can't get tenpai, it's meaningless. I have a bad feeling that Inoue-san already has her winning tile, too. Is there nothing we can do?

Momo dealt a Nan. My eyes widened slightly. "Pon!" I placed the tiles to my right. With that, I have double-wind. There's still a chance.

Koromo glanced between us, then dealt a 6-wan.

"Pon!" Inoue-san smiled.

"Kan." Momo formed a closed kan, drawing a spare tile and dealing it instantly. 1-pin.

"Pon." What is this luck? Weren't we falling behind? But looking at Momo, I somewhat understand. Her eyes are looking straight ahead. That's right. Whether it's Inoue-san's calls or Koromo's control, if you look straight ahead, you can progress. No matter what people say about 'flow' or the luck going against them.

Koromo pouted, dealing another tile. Inoue-san called on it.

Momo discarded her next draw sideways. "Riichi!"

My hand was finally coming together as well. I'd like to be more subtle, but I need to be forceful here. "Riichi."

Koromo closed her eyes, sighing. She dealt one more tile.

"Ron. 2000." Inoue-san looked between us, her expression impassive.

We couldn't get the win there, but it looked like we managed to make Koromo retreat. That's a victory in itself. My eyes widened when I completed my new hand. This... I don't know who I sold my soul to in order to get this hand, but I'm thankful. This is a sword I was given to finish this battle.

Inoue-san glanced sidelong at me, her eyes widening slightly. "Koromo, this is bad. The flow-"

"It's fine. Koromo is above your flow." Koromo opened both her eyes, and for the first time all match I felt the same deep chill and terror I'd felt just once in the finals. "Did you really think I would let things end just like this?"

No, maybe this isn't a blessing from heaven. I can see it already, the spare hatsu that doesn't belong. Koromo looks like she's got a demonic hand, as well. If I'm guessing right, then this hand might be a trap set to destroy me.

Everyone else had gone silent. I swallowed, watching Koromo deal a few tiles. None that contradicted my theory. Looking at this hand, I can clearly see the strongest pattern. Seven pairs, pure characters. But to reach that, I'd have to discard this third Hatsu. And remote thought it is, Koromo's hand might be able to win off that in a crushing way. An equally demonic hand. Pure Green, another yakuman hand that could wait on the Hatsu to complete a pair. Normally, I'd press forwards. Logically speaking, it's unthinkably unlikely. I have three of the Hatsu. But there's a logic beyond ordinary logic. That's telling me that if it's Koromo, she's waiting for this Hatsu. Maybe it's just fear. Perhaps I'm just scared of her. But I don't think so. The logic beyond ordinary probability, that intuition... it's telling me she's waiting for me here.

I'll trust myself to that. I changed direction, breaking up my pair of Pei to get a second tri on my Chun. My draws were still good. I could still do this.

Just as I thought, Koromo discarded the hatsu straight away. She knows better than to keep dead weight.

"Kan." That helps move things along a little further. But the fact she's willing to let me call shows she's in tenpai. She just needs any tile to wait for a pair. She can change waits fast. I glanced at the 9-wan I'd drawn. And if it's her, they'll be aimed right at me. I threw away the second Pei, keeping the 9-wan.

Koromo dealt the 9-wan, changing her wait again. She watched me with apparent interest as we followed each other, tile after tile. "This tenacity... this insight... you who can spun heaven's gifts on a whim, seeing through my dark designs... I'm happy. No matter how many times I call out to them in my mind, they won't come from your hand, the tiles I seek. Not even Touka can do that so thoroughly." She smiled. "You won't be saved, though."

I gritted my teeth. I can avoid her, but my hand's stalling. I can't get any further. Is this Koromo's control?

Momo dealt a Chun the moment she drew it.

I smiled. "Pon!" Just like last time, if we move suddenly and from an unexpected angle, it's possible. I drew a Nan on my own turn, completing my tri. At last, tenpai. But it's a wait for a second 1-sou to complete this pair. If we're following the pattern of this hand, Koromo's in the exact same wait. Neither of us can change our hands easily.

Momo kept the tile she drew, discarding another sideways. "Riichi!"

Inoue-san followed suit, her expression dark. "Riichi."

So those two had caught up as well. I frowned uncomfortably. If I'm reading this correctly, it's a 4-sou, 7-sou wait. Koromo can deal into that. Are we going into another bonus hand?

But she simply remained, discarding the tiles she drew. Her expression was cheerful and innocent again, all trace of her early passion gone.

So this is a stalemate. My eyes widened slightly. And if neither of us move, I'm counting on Momo to win. If not... I scanned the discards, trying to find the missing 1-sou. Inoue-san had already discarded one, but the other wasn't anywhere I could see. Then, haitei raoyue? I frowned, only half watching as Momo and then Inoue-san drew and discarded. I can't switch up my wait any more. This 1-sou can't be dealt. I've called kan twice. Looking at it realistically, if I throw away my hand here I won't get tenpai again. Momo can't call, either, to shift the final tile.

I've been cornered. I gritted my teeth in frustration. With this insane hand, I've been cornered, even after I read her hand flawlessly and dodged every move she made. This pain, this despair... that is Koromo Amae. Is she truly beyond my reach? Is that what she's showing me here?

My eyes widened slightly when Koromo's penultimate turn came. She frowned slightly, her expression ambiguous, and then discard her tile normally without calling riichi.

Momo smiled slightly at her draw. "Kan." She deftly formed a concealed kan. A call you can make in riichi! With that, the final tile's shifted. And the new Dora was Hatsu... I was instantly at Dora 4.

"You... just what have you done?" Inoue-san said, looking agitated. "Only I should be able to make a call like that!"

"As I have told you innumerable times," Koromo said calmly. "I am above your flow."

I didn't understand it until my next draw, this 3-sou... its abnormality screamed at me. I shouldn't have been able to draw this here. I threw away the first of my Haku. I'll aim for it, the single moment where the incomplete haitei raoyue can be defeated. I'll believe in that instant of chance. I'd barely made it in time. 1-sou, 3-sou. Tenpai. In this late stage, where most tiles are discarded, or else I can approximately locate in the hands of the others... it might just come out.

Koromo narrowed her eyes at her draw, discarding it impassively. We were almost out of time. If this was a normal situation, we'd fall into her haitei raoyue. But for that to happen, she needs to call one more time.

Jun looked at her draw with a relieved expression. "I suppose that's right, if it's you, Koromo." She dealt it, the final 2-sou.

"Kan!" Koromo said, pushing her tri open and reaching for the tile. Course locked.

But it's not to be. "Ron." I pushed my tiles open, my expression calm. "Dora 4, Chantra. 12,000."

"That's cutting it fine," Kanbara said, sounding amused. "A Yumi-chin finishing hand."

"You did it, senpai!" Kaori said. "Congratulations!"

"How could this happen? Just how many times do you think we've played Koromo? Do you want me to tell you the probabilities of what you just did?" Ryumonbuchi-san said loudly.

There was a lot of other noise, as well. I just leaned forwards and closed my eyes, feeling exhausted. Had I really won? It hardly felt like it.

Koromo laughed softly. "I'm happy. You managed to keep your promise. And I enjoyed this game to the last."

I nodded. "Thanks to you both, as well."

"Are you content, though?"

I blinked, opening my eyes and staring at her. "I'm sorry?"

"Are you content?" Koromo leaned forwards slightly. "You don't look happy to have won. You look disappointed that it's over. I see those eyes in the mirror, and they are the eyes of one who lusts for struggle. One who seeks higher places."

I frowned at her, unable to think of an appropriate reply. Honestly, even when I win, she leaves me at a loss. I'm less happy than I thought I would be. Just what is it, this strange feeling of hollowness?

I don't understand it at all.

* * *


	11. Chapter 11

**Yumi: Part 11, Momo's Worries**

Very disappointed in the results of the individuals in Saki. I'd have gone for Touka, Yumi and Mihoko to keep the other schools involved. I suppose the privilige of the main characters is too significant to discard, though. And I can always write fanfiction.

**

* * *

**

We ended up leaving the mansion pretty late, since we were invited for dinner as well. Everyone else had enjoyed themselves talking to the others. I suppose Ryumonbuchi aren't so bad, after all. And the bondage seme had talked to me a little, as well. Now everyone else is phoning their parents as we walk back towards the station. I don't have to worry about that, of course. It doesn't really matter when I get back.

Kanbara-senpai looked around, grinning, as everyone else finished. "Wahaha. Well, we're out of ear-shot now. It's okay for you to start gloating, Yumi-chin."

"Not really. I just got lucky," senpai said.

I stepped up my walking pace slightly, glancing at her face. Honestly, I couldn't really work out her expression. I'd thought she'd be happy, but she looked like she was worried about something. Or thinking about something, at least.

"That's a given, isn't it?" Kanbara-senpai said cheerfully. "If you're not lucky, you can't beat Koromo Amae, since she's always lucky. But more importantly than that, you did some pretty absurd and amazing things. That was all you."

"That's right, senpai," Kaori said. "You were amazing. Beating that Koromo."

Mutsuki nodded. "I couldn't have played like that, no matter what."

"That's not true." Yumi-senpai looked up, her expression settling a little. "If I can do it, any of you can do it. I'll be counting on you all for next year, after all."

I smiled. That's more like her. I was getting worried.

"That's true. And Momo, too, of course," Kanbara-senpai said cheerfully. "You're here, right? You were also amazing."

Everyone else added their agreements. I blushed awkwardly, looking down at my feet. "Not at all. I was just supporting senpai..."

"You saved me several times, and hit those two harder than I could ever have asked for," Yumi-senpai said, turning her head and smiling at me. "You're the best, Momo."

I blushed even harder, feeling a dizzy combination of embarrassment and excitement at her words. Impulsively, I wrapped my hands around her arm, breathing out hard and trying to control myself. "Thank you very much..."

"Momo?" Senpai blushed, looking away. "It's nothing. It's true, after all."

"Thank you." I closed my eyes. Why is it, I wonder? Being praised by senpai is this exciting, and being this close to her feels this comfortable. I've always stayed away from others, I'm not used to holding or being held, but when it's senpai I always feel like this. It's the strangest thing. I can't explain it at all.

I do love mahjong, and I'm glad we won, as well. But I played for her and I won for her. It's strange. It's not exactly that I wanted to be praised. It just felt like she'd be happy if she won, which is why I'm worried now. She looked less happy than I thought she'd be. But if she can say that so sincerely, I guess it's not a problem.

"But that was the best," Kanbara-senpai said, putting her hands behind her head as she walked along. "I'm grateful, Yumi-chin. I'm glad I got to see that game before I leave."

"It was nothing. I just want to thank everyone for going along with my selfishness," Yumi-senpai said.

She didn't pull away from me. I guess it's okay because I can't really be seen. "No one thought you were being selfish," I said, half to myself.

"We had that argument before. We all had our reasons," Kanbara-senpai said. "Let's leave this at that."

The others talked a lot as we walked back. As usual, I mostly just watched. That doesn't mean I don't like it, but I generally prefer staying silent and listening to the others. Kanbara-senpai's always lively, and she gets on well with Kaori. Mutsuki-san is a bit calmer. And Yumi-senpai, who's always serious and interesting. Though we were an improvised group, thrown together just in time for the prefectural tournament, we do get on well.

We split up at the station, heading our separate ways. I paused for a moment at the stairs, letting go of Yumi-senpai. It looked like she was lost in thought again. Kanbara-senpai was heading for another platform from us... and there's something I want to ask her. Something that's been bothering me. In the end, I followed after her instead, breaking into a run. I tugged on her shirt from behind. "Kanbara-senpai?"

Kanbara jumped slightly. "Ah, Momo?" She turned to face me, breathing out and smiling. "You shocked me. What is it?"

"Um. There was something I wanted to ask you about, if you have time," I said quietly. "The train isn't coming for a while, right?"

"Right. So go ahead," Kanbara-senpai said cheerfully.

I took a breath, feeling a little tense. I followed her down the stairs. "Recently, senpai... Yumi-senpai, mentioned her own senpai to me. A third-year who involved her in mahjong."

"Hmm. Yumi-chin told you about her?" Kanbara-senpai said, glancing at me cheerfully. "I'm surprised. But she probably didn't tell you very much. Just enough to worry you. Is that right?"

"Not as such," I said, feeling embaressed. "I was just curious, really. And from now on, I'll have to be a senpai to any new recruits we get, after all."

"Wahaha. I'll take your word for it." Kanbara-senpai stepped out onto the platform, looking ahead. "How much should I tell you? Well, her name was Maiko Miura. You should look her up online. She's a somewhat famous mahjong player now."

"Really?" I said. "I've never heard of her..."

"Well, she's still a student, after all. But when Yumi and I were first-years she was a national semifinalist in the individuals, and now she's famous as one of Todai's top-guns on the university circuit. Scary, isn't it?"

I nodded. "That's really remarkable. Someone like that came to a school like ours? Why not Kazekoshi?"

"I have no idea. Miura-senpai was a really enigmatic person. I'm not sure if I ever thought to ask." Kanbara-senpai chuckled. "We were all in awe of her. Ah, I was young in those days."

"I see. And she's at the university Yumi-senpai's going to be attending," I said, half to myself. "That's a coincidence..."

"Jealous?" Kanbara-senpai said.

"No. It's normal," I said.

"Well, it's okay for people to be jealous. But you don't need to worry about that." Kanbara-senpai sat down on one of the empty benches on the platform. "Miura-senpai was the last thing on Yumi-chin's mind when she decided to go for Todai. It's inevitable in a way, since the two of them are over-achievers, academically and in mahjong."

"I see," I said, feeling reassured, and a little stupid for feeling reassured. "Just what relationship did they have? Yumi-senpai and Miura-san?"

"Now that, I can't tell you." Kanbara-senpai grinned. "Everything I just said was speaking as Maiko Miura's kohai. You'd have to ask Yumi-chin about anything else."

I nodded. "I'm sorry... asking something like that."

"Mm. And it's probably best if you leave this alone. I don't know what Yumi-chin told you, or why, but she doesn't really like it, that part of her life." Kanbara-senpai closed her eyes. "She's very serious, after all."

"I see. I'll bear that in mind." I sighed. "I got a sense of that myself, which is one of the reasons why I was worried."

"I knew you were worried." Kanbara-senpai opened her eyes, grinning at me.

I tried to think of a way to reply to that which wouldn't make me sound strange, or otherwise make her laugh. None really occurred. Honestly, it's a little embarrassing.

"Though then again, my reply is a kind of answer for you as well," Kanbara-senpai admitted. "In any case, you probably need to hurry back, right? If you're to catch the same train as Yumi-chin."

I nodded. "Thank you, Kanbara-senpai."

"No need to thank me. Have fun." Kanbara-senpai waved cheerfully.

I ran back up the stairs, frowning slightly. Was this really for the best? Rather than satisfying my curiosity, I've only found new things to worry about. And it really isn't anything to do with me, after all. But... it bothers me. For better or for worse.

I broke into a run as the train arrived. I thought I'd have a little more time. But I managed to get there just in time. Yumi-senpai was already sitting down. She's looking very thoughtful again, so much so I was almost afraid to disturb her. I sat down next to her anyway, touching her arm briefly. "Senpai."

This time, she didn't jump. "Ah, Momo." She sounded like she expected me. "How long have you been there?"

"I just got here," I said. "Sorry for wandering off. I was talking to Kanbara-senpai."

"I see." Yumi-senpai looked at me thoughtfully, but didn't say anything more.

I glanced sidelong at her profile, wondering at that. "Are you okay, senpai? You look a little down."

"I'm fine. Do I look that bad?" Yumi-senpai smiled, looking a little more herself. "Sorry to worry you."

"No," I said, holding my hands in my lap and smiling slightly. "It's fine."

"It's odd, though. I thought I'd be happier than this." Yumi-senpai leaned back, looking upwards. "I wonder if I'd built up a fantastic image of Koromo Amae in my head, someone absolute and unbeatable. Beating her is almost a disappointment. Even she can make mistakes. Even she can lose. Immature of me, isn't it? There's no such thing as an unbeatable opponent."

I nodded. "I see. I guess that could happen, after all. But it's what you always say, senpai. One match doesn't mean very much. If you've played someone twenty or forty times, you can learn from each other."

"That's right, I suppose. Not that I'll have the chance to play her that many times." Yumi-senpai closed her eyes. "That would be good. I envy Ryumonbuchi-san and her team for having that chance."

"You'll be able to do that kind of thing at university, right?" I said. "Tokyo's team is one of the best in the country, after all."

"Right. I am looking forwards to that." Yumi-senpai frowned slightly. "Though I doubt I'll get to play much with the top five."

I paused for a moment, gathering my nerve. "How about Maiko Miura?"

"You know of her?" Yumi-senpai said sharply, straightening and staring intently at me.

"Well, she's famous," I said awkwardly, looking down at my feet. My heart was pounding again. "I just thought you'd like to play someone like that."

Just why am I lying? No, why did I raise her at all? Kanbara-senpai told me not to, as well.

"Hmm. Well, that's true. She was always talented." Yumi-senpai relaxed slightly. "Maiko was my senpai, you know. The one I told you about."

"Really?" I said, trying to sound surprised. This is really uncomfortable.

"I don't know what face I'll make when I see her again, or whether I'll be able to play at the same table as her," Yumi-senpai said. "It's an unpleasant thought."

"I see," I said. "That must be tough."

"Ah, sorry. I shouldn't be so petulant." Yumi-senpai glanced at me. "It's not important. In any case, there will be pleanty of other players there. It's been my dream for a while now."

I nodded, relaxing a little. "That sounds like you, senpai. I'm sure you'll do well."

"I'll see how things go. I've gained a little confidence after today, at least." Yumi-senpai shrugged as we came into a station, smiling wanly. "My resolve is always a little less than I think it is, but I can still move forwards. I suppose it's only human to doubt yourself."

"It's hard for me to believe, though. As far as I can tell, you're always confident skilled," I said. "You didn't hesitate at all in today's matches, either. You're pretty amazing, senpai."

"I was just putting on a brave face," Yumi-senpai said. "Inwardly I got shaken up more than I should have done. But you didn't seem that way."

"Really? Well, I was the same," I said. "Koromo's scary. I just did what I could."

Yumi-senpai closed her eyes briefly, chuckling. "I suppose that makes sense. Insisting on showing your strong side even when you're inwardly worried... it's very human, after all. Both of us are the same in that."

I nodded. "That's true."

And probably not just for mahjong, either. I'm almost sure Yumi-senpai has worries she's unwilling to confide in me. And I'm worried about things I can't exactly articulate to her, or even to myself. Just why her senpai bothers me so much. Just why I'm happy when Yumi-senpai says she's worried, not pleased, by the thought of meeting that person again. It's very cruel of me to think like that. But I won't say it. I'll keep acting as I always do, Yumi-senpai's cheerful and affectionate kohai. Maybe there's something dishonest in that. But I guess it's also very human.


	12. Chapter 12

**Yumi: Part 12, Yumi's Worries**

Rapid update to make up for the delay in the Koromo chapter. Besides, this isn't exactly the most eventful chapter.

I love the implied setting of Saki. Stop for a moment and consider the sheer size and facilities of the _prefectural _tournament building. Presumably the national tournament is held in a lunar palace.

**

* * *

**

I was silent at the dinner table, as usual. My mother continued to humour my father's endless chatter about current affairs. He spoke, she listened, I ignored them both. That's a settled dynamic around here.

So I was surprised when my father looked across the table at me after he'd finished a topic, frowning at me. "How are your preparations for university?"

"It's fine," I said. "All that's left is to pack, and I have a week left."

"That's good. I have great expectations, Yumi. Your results speak for themselves." He smiled, sea-grey eyes focused on me.

"Well, she is our daughter, after all," mother said amicably.

"Thank you very much," I said, blinking slowly. I don't like this. If I'm being complemented, he's working up to something.

"I've every reason to assume you'll do the same at university, as well," he continued. "However, it's important you maintain the same focus as before. It's good to be independent at your age but that shouldn't be at the expense of continued diligence in your studies. Especially since you're studying more seriously than before."

I nodded. "I'll bear that in mind. I have every intention of applying myself constructively, just as before."

Father nodded. "Good. It might be prudent to spend less time on mahjong, as well."

"I don't think that will be necessary," I said carefully. "I can balance my studies with that hobby."

"So you say, but I've been worrying about that," he continued. "A hobby is fine, but you spend altogether too much time on that silly game. I was happy for as long as it kept you out of trouble in High School, but that wasn't entirely the case, in the end."

"I'm not sure what you mean," I said carefully.

"Don't pretend you don't understand," mother said sharply. "There's that new girl, as well."

"That's less important now. Yumi will be leaving, after all," father said. "In any case, I'm just asking you to broaden your horizons. University would be a good time to try something new. Mahjong's been appropriated by the ridiculous populist crowd in recent years, so it would be troublesome to associate yourself too closely with it now you're out of High School."

"I'll think about it," I said. It's amazing how mahjong's become less respectable as its become more popular, if you were to listen to my father.

"There's no future for you there," he said. "Just consider it."

I nodded, aware that the lecture was over.

"And you should start acting in a more lady-like way, as well," mother said, narrowing her lilac eyes at me. "You're an adult, after all. Perhaps I should take you out shopping for clothes before you go. I'm not sure if I can trust you to do it yourself."

And mother will always take any chance to criticise me. "I prefer dressing plainly," I said. "I dislike inappropriate attention."

"From men, at least," mother said sourly. "You're older now, Yumi. You have to grow up. Don't you agree, dear?"

"You have a point," father said cautiously. "Though that could be another troublesome distraction."

"That's typical of you. I'm worried about her, though. I've never known a man won over by good grades alone." Mother frowned at me. "Thinking about your future goes beyond academics. One day you're going to have to marry, as well. I can organise things myself if you're going to continue to be obstinate about this."

"You're too old fashioned, Akino. She can wait until her studies are finished, at least." Father paused for a moment as he ate some more rice.

"You spoil her because of her results," mother said. "Education's a valuable thing but she's picked up strange values because you always encourage her."

"That's uncalled for," father said, frowning. "In the first place, I leave taking care of her to you. If there's a problem, you should look at your own efforts first."

"Thank you for the food." I stood, keeping my expression neutral. I've seen this fight too many times before. "I'll consider everything you've said. I'll go shopping for new clothes, as well. I can do that much alone."

"Mm. Good girl," father said.

Mother just glared suspiciously at me without saying anything. In a way, I've sympathised with her. She's around me enough to see through my bad habits, and has an inkling of how far my thoughts are from what I say. I suppose this is what you call hypocrisy. But if that's what it takes to live peacefully but have my own life, I'll be disingenuous.

I walked up the stairs, heading for the safety of my room again. Once I was inside, I collapsed into my favourite seat, opening my laptop and turning it on. Even if I'd kept an even face and an even tone, I was uncomfortable. Their beliefs and what they expect of me... it's unpleasant, and a little frightening. Honestly, I used to be such a daddy's girl, too. I used to believe them. Those days are long gone, and I know that for better or for worse, I can't be the daughter they want me to be.

That's fine. I'll do my own thing in the end. I logged into the usual program I used to play online, scanning my friends list for familiar faces. Nodo-chi was busy playing a match, so that was no good. Besides, I wasn't sure if I was in the mood for being trounced. Honestly, though I do this to practise, I play better at a physical table. Or perhaps I'm just making excuses.

Momo was online, too, though she was playing as well. I messaged her. _Kasu:_ _Hey. Let's chat when you're done._

She replied pretty quickly. _Shadow334: k. This won't take long. _

I loaded a few mahjong blogs over the next ten minutes, checking for new posts. I was half-way through an analysis of a pro match when Momo send another message.

_Shadow334: I'm done. _

I typed a swift reply. _Kasu: k. How did it go?_

_Shadow334: +5. _

_Shadow334: It was pretty tough until the end, though. How are you?_

I frowned. _Kasu: gj_

_Kasu: Not too bad. Parents being annoying, though._

_Shadow334: Really? Annoying. _

_Shadow334: What this time?_

_Kasu: Same old. Dad's trying to get me to drop mahjong. Mum wants me to dress better and act ladylike._

_Kasu: Whatever that is. Nothing new, anyway._

_Kasu: Anyway, it's fine. How about you?_

_Shadow334: That must suck._

_Shadow334: I'm good. Nothing special._

_Shadow334: Sayako says hi._

I smiled, remembering Momo's younger sister. I'm glad there's one sibling she can relate to. _Kasu: Me too. How is she?_

_Shadow334: Same as ever, I think. _

Someone else messaged me as well. _RoyalDragon: Good evening. _

_RoyalDragon: Ready for a game?_

I smiled slightly as I typed my reply. _Kasu: Hi. Sorry, talking to Shadow right now. Maybe later. _Ryumonbuchi-san... she's on here almost as much as Nodo-chi. But she's been more friendly than she was before our trip to her mansion. Maybe it's just because I got lucky against Koromo, though.

I replied to Momo as well, of course. I'd just had an idea. _Kasu: Anyway, I promised I'd buy some new clothes. Better to at least show willing._

_Kasu: I'm not good at this stuff, though._

_RoyalDragon: I'll wait, if she'll play as well._

_RoyalDragon: She can't do her strange trick here, after all._

Momo was replying while I read that. _Shadow334: Sounds nice._

_Shadow334: Maybe you could show them to me._

_Kasu: Better you than my mother._

_Kasu: RD is asking for a game when we're done._

_Shadow334: k. I have time._

I paused for a moment, wondering whether I should even ask. No harm in it, I guess. _Kasu: Anyway, are you doing anything tomorrow?_

_Kasu: I was wondering if we could meet up for the shopping. More fun than doing it alone._

_Shadow334: That would be great. _

_Kasu: k. Station at 1?_

_Shadow334: That's fine. I'll see you there._

I breathed out, smiling. Well, that should be more fun I thought it would be. _Kasu: Good. Should be fun._

_Kasu: Anyway, shall we play? Our princess doesn't like waiting, I imagine._

_Shadow334: Sure. _

We played a close-fought game and two rematches. Ryumonbuchi-san won two, and I barely won the third. She's really in her element online. After that, I whiled away the evening as I always do, chatting to friends and playing mahjong. It's my hobby, after all. But it's not just that. Father was almost right about one thing. Becoming a pro mahjong player would be difficult for me. Since I hadn't managed to get anywhere in the High School tournament, I'd be disadvantaged from the start. University was my chance, though. If I could make the Todai Five by my third year, I'd be able to advance. But to do that, I needed to get better. And improving is done by taking one step, then another, playing game after game and working hard. That's how I've come this far. And it's how I'll go on. At the least, I know now that it's possible to beat demons like Koromo Amae. That helps.

If I'm honest with myself, though, it's never been just mahjong. I started playing to please that senpai, and even when I'd intended to quit so I could prepare for my exams I ended up staying on. Ostensibly so I could train our kohai and prepare them for next year. The reality was I just wanted to have an excuse to see Momo again, even after losing the prefectural tournament. It was something I got away with, somehow, because studying comes very easily to me, but looking back on it I was being reckless. I frowned as I shut down my laptop, standing and beginning to undress. It's always been that way, I suppose. I'm more impulsive than I like to think, especially about people I like.

I stood, beginning to undress for bed. But there's nothing I can do this time, is there? I can't find any more excuses. We won't be able to stay in the same place. We'll still talk, of course, and we'll still play mahjong. But chatting to Momo online isn't the same. There's something about being with her physically that's just more enjoyable. Her familiarity and her shyness, her earnestness and her kindness... all of those things.

I sighed, closing my eyes. I've thought about this a hundred times. It's not going to change anything. The only purpose it serves is to worsen my mood. But even so, I can't stop myself from thinking about it. Just like that time. I opened my eyes, touching the dark wood box on my desk. Maybe I'm thinking about this the wrong way. If I'm acting in a way that makes me unhappy, maybe I'm just being an idiot. I ran my fingers along the cold wood. I'm a coward, fundamentally. And I can already think of so many reasons not to admit my feelings. But those reasons might be excuses. I need to be able to separate intuition from fear.

To be honest, mahjong is easier.


	13. Chapter 13

**Yumi: Part 13, Close Friends  
**

Tired writer is tired. How did I do 5000 words every two days again?

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**

I waited by the front of the station, looking around for Yumi-senpai's purple hair. She's always early for everything, so I thought I'd try to beat her today, just for once. It looks like I managed to do that, but now I'm about half an hour early. This is pretty boring. I don't know how senpai does it. I glanced at my phone again, sighing, before slipping it into my pocket and looking around again.

I'm a little excited, though. I don't really like clothes shopping, but if it's with Yumi-senpai, it will probably be fun. For a start, she isn't someone who knows much about clothing, so it's not as if she'll be judging me. I enjoy her company generally, but it's also a special occasion when we do something we don't normally do. And it's also a chance to impress her, I think. There's no point in brooding, whether it's about Miura-san or about Yumi-senpai going to university. All I can do is try my best to enjoy this time and make Yumi-senpai enjoy it as well. I feel like I can do that much, at least. It's best to be positive, right?

I smiled as Yumi-senpai arrived, running towards her. "Senpai!" She looked up, catching sight of me, but I grabbed her arm with both my hands anyway, sliding to a halt and bumping into her.

She stumbled back slightly, barely keeping her footing. "Momo... good afternoon."

"Good afternoon. Sorry about that," I said, blushing a little. I let go of her arm reluctantly. She's warm, just like always.

"Not at all. I'm used to it by now." Yumi-senpai smiled. "It's better than me not knowing where you are."

I nodded. "Mm. Just as long as it's not a bother."

"Why would it be?" Yumi-senpai gave me a relaxed look. "In any case, you're pretty early."

"I caught an earlier train," I said. "I thought it'd be nice to be the early one, for once." She looks happy today, which is good. This holiday, Yumi-senpai's been more melancholy than usual. It hasn't been this bad since we failed at the prefectural tournament.

"I see. In any case, there's no point in standing around. Shall we go?"

I nodded. "Okay."

We walked out of the station, side-by-side. I glanced sidelong at her. Yumi-senpai's dressed roughly like she was at her house, with jeans and a T-shirt under an open dark jacket. I think it looks good, myself. "So your parents are being problematic again?" I asked curiously.

Yumi-senpai nodded, frowning slightly. "Like I said yesterday, it's the usual story. I shouldn't complain too much, I suppose. Things could be worse."

"If it's annoying, I think it's okay to complain," I said cheerfully. "At least to get it off your chest, right?"

"I suppose so. I'm sure mother, at least, complains about me behind my back." Yumi-senpai crossed the road with me in tow, weaving between the crowd. I wonder if it looked like she was talking to herself. She never complains about that, though. "But honestly, my father is almost worse. Both of them have... this image of me. Mother knows what she has in mind isn't what I'm actually like, but father hasn't realised that. It's frustrating."

"I see. That does sound tough." I glanced at her. "Can't you just talk to them? Maybe if you explain your feelings a little, they'd be able to understand."

"Even if you say that, it's probably impossible," Yumi-senpai said, sighing. "All it'd do is cause a huge argument. Just telling them I want to become a mahjong pro would do that. They're too set on me becoming a respectable married woman."

"That's... honestly, it doesn't sound like you, senpai," I said, giggling. "Not right now, anyway."

Yumi-senpai smiled, glancing at me. "Hey, hey... should I be happy or angry at that? Is my personality that bad?"

"That's not it. It's just you're way too young, I guess," I said. "And you have your own dreams, right?"

Yumi-senpai nodded. "Right. Honestly, my current self... perhaps myself forever, would make a miserable housewife. Making yourself suffer to keep up appearances- I just don't want to have to live like that. But it's not as if I can live exactly as I like, either."

"I see. You're always realistic, after all. I wish I could say something more." I smiled at her. "With my family, it's the opposite... my parents pay me no heed at all. I guess it's convenient, since I can basically do what I like."

"That's really tough in it's own way," Yumi-senpai said. "You might have it worse than me."

I shook my head. "I don't think so. I don't let it bother me."

"Well, it's good if you're positive about it," Yumi-senpai said, sounding dubious.

I glanced up at a shop. "This could be good, right? For clothes shopping."

Yumi-senpai nodded. "You're right. I almost forgot why we were here. Let's go in."

I slowed slightly, staying a half-step behind Yumi-senpai's taller figure. I could feel my presence fade. I'm always uncomfortable in places like this. It often feels like intruding on somewhere I shouldn't be. "Honestly, I mostly make do with my family's hand-me-downs," I said quietly. "We have quite a lot of those, after all."

"I can imagine. I've always picked comfortable clothes without thinking too hard about how they look." Yumi-senpai sighed, walking uneasily towards one of the racks. "This is less about stuff I actually want to wear and more about second-guessing mother. I guess if I can find one or two things that she'd like to show willing, that should do."

"I'm sure you'll be able to find something you like, as well," I said, trying to sound encouraging. "I'll help, too."

"Thanks. I shouldn't be so negative," Yumi-senpai said, looking up at me. "I can find stuff I like, and it is a chance to try something new. Maybe we can find something you'd like, as well."

I nodded. "Okay. Let's do our best together."

Yumi-senpai doubtfully picked up a black frilly dress, holding it up to her. "I don't think this stuff suits me at all, though. It's pretty... bold."

"I don't think it looks that bad," I said. "Just different."

"Is this what my mother had in mind, I wonder?" Yumi-senpai said dubiously, sliding it back in place. "Or is she thinking of stuff that doesn't exist any more?"

I blinked, looking up slightly. It looks like at least one other person was staring at Yumi-senpai. I stepped back slightly, trying to strengthen my presence. "I think it's best if you don't worry about her. Just concentrate on what you like."

"You're right. It's a problem if I'm stuck at her pace." Yumi-senpai picked up another dress. "I haven't worn anything like this in so long. But I guess I'm just making excuses. White's no good, though." She put it back decisively.

I smiled slightly, turning and heading for another rack of clothes. Honestly, even her awkwardness puts me at ease, in a way. "Well, it doesn't have to be a one-piece if you're uncomfortable. How about just a skirt with your normal shirts?"

"I suppose that could work," Yumi-senpai said. "I wear something similar at school, after all. You should try some of these, though. I think you'd look good in a dress."

"I doubt that," I said. "It's embarrassing."

"Do you think so? It'd be cute, I think," Yumi-senpai said, looking at me.

I blushed. "I don't have your figure. I think it suits you more, however I look at it."

"That's silly. You don't have anything to be ashamed of." Yumi-senpai stepped forwards, holding the black dress against me. "See? It'd be cute. You should try it on."

I fought down my embarrassment, looking up at her. "I'll try it on if you do, too."

Yumi blinked. "Hmm... well, I guess just trying it on is fine, right? Even if it looks silly."

I nodded. "I promise I won't laugh."

Yumi-senpai smiled. "Thanks. That'll be helpful."

And just like that, we somehow relaxed and got used to an unfamiliar environment, just doing things our way. We tried on a lot of different clothes and went to several different shops in the process. It's pretty remarkable how much clothes can change you. Yumi-senpai in a dress is a lot different from normal, after all. It's a little less comfortable, a little more provocative... somehow I'm really reminded she's a young woman and an attractive one at that. I don't think she's normally thought of as beautiful, but I think she's pretty. At the least, she's striking and memorable. It's encouraging for someone like me, who doesn't really look like a beautiful girl in an ordinary way. And her compliments were really flattering, as well, even if they were probably undeserved. It made me feel good, even so. If it's Yumi-senpai, I know she's being honest with me. And looking attractive in her eyes is something really valuable to me, since she's the person whose opinions I most value. Even if everyone else found me plain or boring, if she likes me, that's enough. That's how I feel.

We didn't buy very much, though. Trying things one for each other and wearing something regularly are two different things. But we still brought a few things we particularly liked, so I suppose it was a success. And we had fun, as well.

"I think this will do for now," Yumi-senpai said eventually, as we left the fourth shop carrying a few bags. "I don't know about you, but I'm getting tired."

I nodded in agreement. "Mm. Normally we're sitting down..."

Yumi-senpai checked her watch. "Ah. Shall we have a snack at a café, or something?"

"That would be good," I said, glad we weren't heading back already.

"It'll be my treat," Yumi-senpai said. "I dragged you out here to tag along with me, after all."

"No, it's no trouble," I said. "I've had a great time."

"Good." Yumi-senpai smiled at me. "Honestly, I'm always worried about boring people. I get that a lot."

"That's not true at all," I said sharply. "And if people say that, they don't know you very well."

"Thanks. Honestly, that's also reassuring. I know I have a serious personality." Yumi-senpai paused for a moment. "Maiko always said the same thing. Miura-senpai, I mean. She had a point, but when someone you care about says something like that a lot... it's not as if I was trying to bore her."

I looked at her, trying to gauge her expression. "You don't have to talk about this if it makes you unhappy."

"No, I want to. Maybe I need to. For one reason or another, recently, I've been thinking about her more and more." Yumi-senpai glanced at me. "Kanbara's been spoiling me and I've never really told anyone else. I thought that would be fine, but when I think about it, I've been letting those memories affect how I treat you. And that's unfair."

"I've never had any reason to complain," I said. "You've always treated me well."

"Maybe it's unfair to me, rather than you," Yumi-senpai said vaguely, waving a hand. "And in any case, I want you to know, as well. I want to be able to tell you about everything. By now, at the end... if I can do that maybe I won't have any regrets. I'm not sure."

I nodded. "I want to know. So I'll listen if you want to tell me."

Yumi-senpai picked a small café close to the station, heading for a small table for two in the far corner. "It's not a very interesting story, though," she said, smiling. "I'm probably being self-indulgent." She sat down. "Maybe that's okay, though. Maybe people should be allowed to be selfish every once in a while."

I sat opposite her, putting my bags on the floor. "I'll listen to anything. If it worries you, then it'd worry me as well. We're close friends, right? Not just senpai and kohai."

Yumi-senpai blinked slowly. "Close friends, is it? In any case, I'll tell you about Maiko."


	14. Chapter 14

**Yumi: Part 14, Past Encounters**

If Yumi beats Koromo at the training camp, I'll laugh my head off. It probably won't happen, though. Even so, details moving from 'healthy grey area' to 'known (and I got them wrong)' is inevitable when I'm writing for an airing show with my style.

**

* * *

**

_It all began three years ago. When I first entered Tsuruga Academy._

I hurriedly ate the rest of my breakfast, trying to stay calm. Father had already left for work, but mother was pottering around the kitchen when I stood up. "Thanks for the food. I'll be going now."

Mother turned her head and nodded, smiling at me. "Have a safe trip. Enjoy yourself, Yumi."

I nodded, smiling at her. "I will. See you later." I turned and headed out.

_We were on better terms then, my parents and I. I was quite the daddy's girl. I was always good at studying and never very good at socialising. It's not unnatural that I did the former more than the latter. I'm not sure if that was the best way to live, but from their perspective, I was probably perfect._

"My name is Yumi Kajiki. My interests... I like reading novels and I play the violin." I looked straight ahead, trying not to show my discomfort in this strange classroom surrounded by strange faces. "I hope to have a good year with you all."

I sighed as I sat down, ignoring the introduction of the person behind me. It wasn't as if I'd be able to remember all their names, after all. No one so far had struck me as particularly interesting, either.

The pink-haired girl sitting next to me caught my eye, smiling. "Pleased to meet ya, Kajiki-san."

"Right. I'm pleased to meet you, as well," I said, frowning slightly and turning away. What was her name again? Kanbaru-san?

She grinned toothily. She must be one of those popular types. They always make me uncomfortable.

_Honestly, she hasn't changed at all._

I was just unpacking my lunch-box when she pushed her desk next to mine, grinning again. "You don't mind if I join you, right?"

"It's fine," I said, trying to sound discouraging. Honestly, she should ask first. It's a bother.

"Ah. Is that home-made?" She asked, glancing at my lunch-box thoughtfully.

"Yes. My mother made it," I said brusquely.

"That's nice. I just have bread and snacks." She placed her lunch on her table. "Can I have some?"

"Frankly, I'd rather you didn't," I said shortly. Is she just trying to cadge food off me?

"Wahahaha. Okay, I get it. I'll leave it alone." She tore open the plastic and picked up her bread roll. "So, have you worked out what club you're going to join? The literature club, maybe?"

"I'm not interested in joining a club," I said shortly. "Honestly, it's a waste of time."

"Do you think so? They're fun," that girl said reasonably. I didn't say anything but she carried on, undeterred. "I was part of my school's mahjong club in middle school, and that was a lot of fun. But they don't have one here, I think. It's a shame."

I frowned. Well, I guess I could relax a little. She doesn't appear to have bad intentions. "That's a shame. Aren't there schools very good for that in this area, though? Mahjong."

"Kazekoshi, yeah. But that'd be an unreasonably long commute for me. This school's a lot closer." She chuckled. "I wasn't that good, either. It was more about taking part, I guess. I made some good friends."

"So are you going to join a different club?" I asked.

"I guess so. They're advertising this afternoon so I guess I'll look around and see if something interests me." She smiled. "You should come too. Maybe we'll find something you'd be interested in, as well."

"I told you. I'm not interested generally," I said. "I need to concentrate on my studies."

She laughed. "No one can study all the time, you know."

I just shrugged. It didn't really matter what she thought.

_It's an odd coincidence. If I hadn't sat next to Kanbara, and if I hadn't tagged along with her, just where would I be? Things might have turned out very differently. But honestly, that goes for everything. Whether it's mahjong or life, infinite possibilities always crystallise into a single now. What might have been is irrelevant._

Just as Kanbara-san had said, there were a lot of older students trying to recruit from the first-years in the yard that afternoon. I've never been good in situations like this. I hung back awkwardly while Kanbara-san talked to the swimming club, trying to avoid catching anyone's gaze. "How was it?" I asked when she came back.

"Ah, so-so," Kanbara-san said, rubbing the back of her neck. "Honestly, it sounds like a lot of effort. They're pretty serious, and I'm not very fit."

"You can always get fitter," I pointed out. "Isn't that the point?"

"I guess so." Kanbara-san smiled. "How about you, then? You could join."

"I told you already," I said impatiently. "I'm not interested."

"Then you're tagging along just to keep me company?" Kanbara-san said playfully. "Thanks, Kajiki-san."

"It's nothing," I said, a little taken aback. "It's not as if we have any real homework to do, after all." I looked away, frowning, then blinked at two older students ahead. "Kanbara-san, isn't that a mahjong club?"

"What? Seriously?" Kanbara-san stepped forwards, blinking in surprise. "That's unexpected. I was sure they didn't have one." She approached quickly.

I followed along at a more leisurely pace, watching with interest. The members were two older girls, probably third years. One of them glanced past Kanbara-san and looked at me, her eyes widening slightly beneath glasses. I looked away instantly, feeling unnerved. But after a few moments talking to Kanbara-san she broke away and approached me instead.

She was in front of me before I could back away, smiling down at me. "Good afternoon." She was strikingly tall, with long, silken dark hair tailed back into a large ponytail and deep blue eyes. I was taken aback by her presence. Her beauty, I suppose. "I'm Maiko. Maiko Miura."

"I'm Yumi Kajiki," I said, momentarily taken aback. But I rallied quickly. "Do you want something with me?"

"Yes. I wanted you to join the mahjong club," Miura-senpai said firmly. "I'd appreciate it if you accepted."

"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm not interested in joining any clubs."

"Because you're concentrating on studying?" Miura-senpai frowned thoughtfully. "You aren't the usual go-home club type, however I look it."

"That's right," I said, frowning. "So I can't join."

"I don't think that's a very good reason," Miura-senpai said cheerfully. "Just something you're used to. But don't you think it would be interesting to try something new? Or do you have a prior experience with mahjong?"

"Not at all," I said. "In any case, I'm sorry." I bowed my head, trying to back away.

A strong hand touched my left shoulder lightly. "Now, now. There's no need to rush off." Miura-senpai smiled as I frowned at her. "You're not doing anything this afternoon, are you? You could observe at least."

"I promised my parents I'd be home promptly," I lied, frowning at her. Honestly, she's really persistent.

"You can call them." Miura-senpai let go of my shoulder. "At the least, I want to talk to you. So don't go running off on me just yet."

"There are a lot of other people, aren't there?" I said. "They'll be more interested, so it might be better to talk to them."

"No. I'm interested in you, Kajiki-san." Miura-senpai pushed her glasses up her nose. "A lot of the others here already have clubs they want to join. And very few people will be like your friend, who wanted to play mahjong, at this school. So people like you, who don't want to join any club at all, are the most valuable to me."

That's surprisingly logical. I frowned. "That assumes you can persuade people like me, though."

"I'm confident I can. Even if I wasn't, it's necessary." Miura-senpai moved her hand up from her glasses, touching her hair briefly. "But I'm interested in you, as well. I'm fond of your type."

"Please don't mock me," I said, taken aback.

"I'm not joking. You're bright and forceful, but endearingly shy." Miura-senpai smiled. "I shouldn't say that, but I'm only being honest. I do like that type of person."

I stared at her, my cheeks flushing. She's really strange. Her confidence is even more striking than her appearance, and she can say stuff like that without blinking. "That's irrelevant. I can't play mahjong anyway."

"That doesn't matter. I can teach you easily," Miura-senpai said. "We're a new club, so I'm expecting to start from scratch. And someone like you will pick things up fast. How about it? Why not come along for today, at least? You can call your parents, right?"

I frowned, trying to find another excuse. It's really hard to say no when she's like this. This is why I hate this kind of situation. "If I do that, you'll leave it at that, right?" I said. "You won't chase me after that."

"I promise." Miura-senpai grinned. "I won't need to do that. Today I'll ensure you come back tomorrow of your own volition."

_I guess that was when I really realised that Maiko was different from other people. She has boundless self-confidence, and a kind of magnetism, a charisma that lets her pull off outrageous statements and sound impressive. I was bored and straight-forwards, and I suppose I wanted to experience something. I wanted to be excited, I wanted to dedicate myself to something, I wanted to believe in someone. Without knowing that in so many words, even so, I was under her spell from that moment on. _

In the end, it was just us four in a classroom borrowed for the purpose. Miura-senpai explained the rules of mahjong to me while Kanbara-san and the other senpai set up the tiles. I followed as carefully as I could.

"Chikaho, set up a fourth wall," Miura-senpai said, breaking off and glancing at the other senpai.

The second senpai frowned, brown eyes widening slightly in surprise. "I thought we'd be playing three-player."

"No, Kajiki-san will play," Miura-senpai said. "Even if she's an amateur, it's more exciting than just watching."

"If you say so," the second senpai said, frowning.

"Wahaha." Kanbara-san looked pleased. "Don't worry, Kajiki-san. I'll go easy on you."

I played my first game in that place. It was one-sided from the start. Miura-senpai won and won and won, always by someone else's tile. It'd be bad enough, but she always won from me. No matter what I did, she'd hit me. I was a beginner who could barely keep my melds straight, but even so, I felt both useless and stupid for being unable to stop this rush. I resented her, as well. Did she bring me here just to humiliate me?

"Just what are you doing, Maiko?" the second senpai said eventually. "Playing without holding back... are you trying to drive her away or something? At least target Kanbara-san or I, instead."

"It's not as if I'm targeting her specifically." Miura-senpai smiled. "And if this was a normal person, you'd be right. Coming at them this seriously would drive them away. But I think it's the opposite for Kajiki-san. If I held back, she'd eventually work it out. And that, itself, would drive her away."

I gritted my teeth, not saying anything. I'm pretty proud, so I appreciate those words. But I can't do anything to stop her. I'd almost rather be fooled by her.

"This is my true strength, Kajiki-san," Miura-senpai said, meeting my eyes and holding them. She pushed her glasses up her nose. "It's not as if you're worse than a beginner should be. It's just I'm really good. That's all."

That arrogance, more than anything else, convinced me I had to do something. So I put everything else out of my mind and just concentrated on putting a closed hand together, and in the end I got lucky. "Ah! Tsumo," I said uncertainly. I pushed my tiles over one after the other with shaking hands. "I'm not sure about the points, though."

Miura-san smiled, taking me through each step of the scoring. "1300/2600," she said, finishing. "Not bad."

I breathed out, my hands shaking slightly as I accepted the points. That felt really good. It was possible, however good she said she was.

"Beginners luck," the second senpai said. "I guess even you can't stop that, Maiko."

"No, not at all," Miura-senpai said. "That's something she created with her own hands."

_I lost in the end, of course. I had hardly any points left, and Maiko's lead was absolutely ridiculous. It wasn't just me. Kanbara-san and the other senpai had also been totally dominated by her. But even if it hurt, it felt right. I hadn't totally been crushed, and I hadn't been patronised, either. That was a decent feeling._

We walked back towards the station together. I didn't say much at first. I was exhausted, for some reason, and I'd been left with a lot to think about, so I let the other three talk and just walked along in silence. I was interrupted by the feeling of someone picking up a lock of my hair. I glanced back over my shoulder. "What?"

"No. I was just curious," Miura-senpai said, letting go. "You have very pretty hair. Long hair like that isn't something you see very often in girls nowadays."

"Please don't randomly touch my hair," I said, looking ahead and scowling. "It's a bother."

Miura-senpai laughed. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. But again, I'm just being honest."

"You should probably cut out that honesty of yours," the second senpai said reproachfully. "You'll scare her off."

"I hope not," Miura-senpai said. "I'd be saddened if that happened. I want to see you again, Kajiki-san. I want to play mahjong with you again, as well. It was fun."

"That's right," Kanbara-san said. "It wasn't so bad, was it, Kajiki-san?"

"You and I both got totally defeated, though," I said pointedly.

"Wahaha!" Kanbara-san grinned, running to catch up to me. "That doesn't matter. Next time I'll do my best to win, after all."

"You're way too cheerful," I said, sighing.

"How about it, though?" Miura-senpai said. "Will you play us again?"

I closed my eyes, hesitating briefly. "Well, I'll think about it. But I'm not promising anything, understand."

"That's fine. I'll be waiting for you, Kajiki-san."

_It all started just like that. And if that was all it had ever been, well, it would have been a simple and a good thing. But people are really complicated, I guess. Neither of us could leave things at just that, and so we made some big mistakes._


	15. Chapter 15

**Yumi: Part 15**

Just to note I'll be back at university from Sunday, and so updating may become more irregular accordingly. I'll see what I can do, and I certainly won't let this be another Chains. This reduced amount of material is ideally more focused than my old style and certainly more realistic for my free time in term.

**

* * *

**

_We were starting from nothing. Even Maiko's best efforts could only go so far, especially since she didn't like holding back. In the end, I was the fourth, the one who let the others play full games. I convinced myself that was reason enough to keep playing. The fact that I'd been won over by Maiko wasn't something I really wanted to admit to myself. Even so, I admired her. She was an impressive person._

"Ron. 4000." Miura-senpai grinned. "Thanks for the game."

I breathed out, sighing. As usual, a one-sided beating. "At least I'm over 10,000 points this time."

"Wahaha. Thanks for the game." Kanbara-san looked cheerful even though she was third. I don't know how she's always so energetic, but I suppose it's just her personality.

I checked my watch. "I should probably head home."

"Sure. It is about that time," Miura-senpai said, beginning to gather up her tiles. "You've been progressing quickly, Kajiki-san."

"Not really," I said, sliding my tiles towards her. "I'm still pretty awful."

"You're a beginner. Don't be that hard on yourself." Miura-senpai smiled encouragingly at me. Her hand brushed against mine as she took the tiles from me. "You're starting to read the ponds, and you're hesitating a lot less. It's impressive to get that far this fast."

"That's right. You're a little frightening," Kanbara-san said amicably.

I snorted, pulling my hand away awkwardly. "I find that rather unlikely..."

Miura-senpai laughed, holding my gaze. "If you say so. Do you have a few minutes after this? I'd like to talk to you about something."

"I suppose so," I said, frowning slightly. Just what is she up to now?

"Good girl. I'll catch up with you, Chikaho," Miura-senpai said, packing away the last of her tiles.

"If you say so," Ito-senpai said, shouldering her bag. "See you tomorrow."

"Mm. I'll see you later," Miura-senpai said.

Kanbara-senpai waved as she also left ahead of us. I watched her go before turning my attention back to Miura-senpai. However I looked at it, she was probably planning something. I frowned uncomfortably. "So, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

"Here isn't a good place," Miura-senpai said. "Let's go, shall we?"

I picked up my bag. "Why do I have to wait behind if you're only going to say that?"

"Because I wanted to talk to you," Miura-senpai said. "You never say very much, Kajiki-san. So I'm a little interested in what you have to say."

I followed her as she walked confidently towards the door. "That doesn't make sense."

"Really? It makes sense to me," Miura-senpai said. She stretched her arms. "How have you been finding it? Mahjong."

"It's interesting," I admitted carefully. "I'm still no good at all."

"Maybe so, but you're making progress," Miura-senpai said. "These things come with time."

"You're very blunt," I said, frowning. Honestly, I expected a little more encouragement.

"There's no point in lying," Miura-senpai said. "There's no meaning in false praise, after all." She pushed her glasses up her nose, smiling. "But you've been very helpful. Thanks to you, this is a club in a meaningful sense."

"Just for now," I said. "When you get better members than me, I can stop."

"Would you really want to, though, I wonder?" Miura-senpai said. "We wouldn't see each other regularly then, after all."

I closed my eyes. "My father's still worried about my studies, you know."

"But you aren't now? That's a relief." Miura-senpai grinned. "In any case, it's a safe thing to say. I don't have any more expectations. It's a shame, since we're one person short of a full team."

I scowled at her, but decided against correcting her. She always responds to what she wants to hear, not what I say. "Just why did you decide to start a club like this, anyway?"

"Because I like mahjong," Miura-senpai said.

"What's with that half-baked response?"

"Is there a need for a more complicated reason?" she asked. "I've always thought you need more reasons not to do something."

"You're actually a really simple person, aren't you, Miura-senpai?" I said.

"And you're really too honest," Miura-senpai said, smirking. "There wouldn't be many girls who take that tone with a senpai."

I blushed, biting my lip. "Sorry."

"Not at all," Miura-senpai said. "I like it. It's interesting." She glanced at me as we passed through the school's gates. "Though it means I'll also be that blunt about you."

"I think you'd do that whatever I did or said, senpai," I said, with feeling.

"Even if I said this was just what I did with you?" Miura-senpai said playfully. "I treat you differently from the other first-years, Kajiki-san."

"Because I agreed to play mahjong," I said. "That's the main reason why we know each other, after all."

"No. We just met through that. But I'm interested in you, Kajiki-san. That's a little different." Miura-senpai glanced at me thoughtfully.

"I suppose so," I said, looking away. However I look at it, she wants something from me. It's embarrassing.

"Hey. Are you going out with anyone?" Miura-senpai said. In her usual tone, as if she was asking me how my studies were going.

"Huh?" I stared at her, blushing. "Why are you asking me that so suddenly?"

"Because I'm interested in your answer," Miura-senpai said.

I swallowed, twisting my hands together behind my back. "No. Not as such."

"I see," Miura-senpai said. "That is interesting. So, would you be interested in going out with me?"

I stopped, my stomach clenching. I was so completely thrown it took my several seconds just to bring my thoughts together, since my body was reacting crazily. Pride and terror warred with each other, making me dizzy. And I felt an incredible degree of self-consciousness, as well. "What are you saying?" I asked weakly.

"Just what I said," Miura-senpai said, stopping as well. I wasn't sure what kind of face she was making. I could barely even see her.

"Why?" I ask eventually.

"Because I like you," Miura-senpai said. "I don't really need another reason. So, how about it?"

I tried to escape from those forthright eyes. It's not as if I didn't know what to say. It was way too sudden. It was wildly inappropriate. I didn't have the time to be involved in a relationship right now. And in the first place, if I was going out with someone it wouldn't be a girl and it certainly wouldn't be this weird, forceful, ambiguous senpai.

"I'll think about it," I said quietly.

_I'd always been thrown by Maiko. She was very different from me, and I tried to put on a brave front to hide the degree to which she affected me. To be honest, I admired her. She was a lot of things I felt I couldn't ever be. And so strangely, even when she was making herself vulnerable by confessing to me I felt like I was on the back foot. She'd judge my reply, and it would change things in ways I didn't feel I really controlled. It's not as if that was really the case, either of those two things. It was more like a state of mind. I felt like I was always running to catch up with her, since she dragged me into unfamiliar things. That was both exhilarating and terrifying. I've tried to capture the positive side of that without the negative, myself, in a small way. What Kanbara calls my leadership. But it's different from what Maiko did to me. The good and the bad. I'm not sure if I could knowingly do that to a person. And even as time passed, it felt like things were still that way. I never quite felt secure. _

I sipped my lemonade as two ice cream desserts were placed in front of us. "My parents have been complaining again. I've always spent my birthdays with my mother, so I think she's offended."

Maiko smiled. "That must be irritating. You're more than at the age when birthdays should be spent with friends. Or more special people."

"It is a little difficult," I admitted. I looked down uneasily. "I think my mother suspects, as well. About us."

"Hmm. Perceptive, is she?" Maiko took a bite of her dessert. "It's fine, isn't it? I don't think we have anything to be ashamed of."

"You're right in principle, but you don't know my parents," I said weakly. I played with my glass, looking down at the table awkwardly. "I don't want to have that argument. Not yet."

"You're always like that, Yumi," Maiko said reproachfully. "They're only overbearing because you let them be that way. Isn't it better to have the argument now, rather than later? It won't get better and you'll only put it off."

I glared at her uncomfortably. "It's not as if I want to upset them. I don't want to have an argument, if at all possible."

"People who won't privilege their happiness over the superficial feelings of others won't ever be happy to begin with," Maiko said, delicately eating some more of her dessert. She played idly with a strand of her black hair. "Your parents don't know the real you, after all. It's a weak form of love."

"That's not true!" I said sharply.

I was cut off by Maiko placing a hand under my chin. With her other hand she scooped some ice cream from my dessert with her spoon, holding it against my lips. She smiled. "Say ahhh."

I opened my mouth without saying anything, blushing furiously. It feels really childish, but this is one of her favourite games. I guess there's no choice but to go along with it.

"Don't make a scary face. It's not very cute." Maiko leaned back. "And eat your ice cream before it melts."

I pouted uncomfortably, picking up my spoon with my cheeks burning. I hate being rebuked.

Maiko pushed her glasses up her nose. "If you want me to say something, I can. I'll take responsibility, as well."

"No. It's my problem, isn't it?" I said. "And it's also my responsibility. I chose this, as well."

"You're very adult, Yumi," Maiko said. "Very serious. It's cute."

"If it's adult of me, then it probably shouldn't be cute," I retorted, eating my ice cream.

Maiko laughed softly. "True, true. Are you free on Saturday? There's a film I'd like to see."

"Saturday's a little..." I said dubiously. "Kanbara-san's invited me around her house on that day."

"Ah. Cancel that, then," Maiko said. "You can do that some other day."

"Can't we see the film some other time?" I said, frowning slightly. "I already promised her I'd come. She wanted to do something for my birthday, which is very kind of her."

"You're my girlfriend, Yumi," Maiko said firmly. "It's normal for our time to be privileged. I've made sacrifices as well, you know."

"I'm not being selfish. I'm being polite." I sighed at her expression. Something like that will never work on her. "I'll ask her. But if she insists, I'll go to hers."

"Asking her is pleanty. That girl is very good-natured," Maiko said firmly. "She won't refuse things you ask, Yumi."

"That sounds familiar," I said weakly, eating more of my ice cream.

Maiko touched my cheek again. "Now don't make that face. It's because I like you a lot, Yumi. I enjoy our time together."

I nodded, smiling despite myself. "I know."

"In any case, I have a present for you." Maiko reached into her bag, pulling out a finely-made wooden box. "Here. I didn't wrap it. It'd be a waste."

"It's beautiful," I said, taking it from her and placing it on the table. "Is this a mahjong set?"

"Right," Maiko said. "I know you don't have one of your own. Considering you're a member of my club, that's problematic."

"It's not as if I have anyone but the club to play," I said. I placed my palm on the box. "Thanks a lot, Maiko."

"Not at all. It's your birthday, after all."

_I was young. Younger than I thought I was, younger than Maiko said I was. You're probably more mature than I was at your age, in many ways. So I didn't really think about the future. But certainly, in a hazy way, I romantically imagined that my next birthday would be the same. And the one after that, and the one after that. My dreams didn't really know the limits of reality. _


	16. Chapter 16

**Yumi: Part 16, Past Regrets  
**

_It's difficult to explain. I'm not fond of talking about it, to begin with. Somehow it feels that because of that, I've been unfair to you. But perhaps that's just my guilt. Mm. I suppose it'd be more abnormal to talk about every past relationship with people you know now. Perhaps it's not been good for me, though. Everything about Maiko's been something I've put in a box in my head, and kept away from anything else. But that doesn't make things easier for me. Quite the reverse. In any case, things lasted for a year or so. There were many enjoyable things. But there were also painful things. Maiko's straight-forwards, so when she was pleasant I felt sure she was sincere, but if she disagreed with me, she'd be blunt. I always had just enough pride to stand my ground, and by the latter half of the year, there was often more disagreements than pleasant moments. She was careless, I was clingy. She was reckless, I was boring. She was cruel, I was over-sensitive. Even so. Even so, I believed._

"What's wrong, Yumi-chin? That's a long face."

"I'm fine," I said absently, turning her head and smiling at her. "Just a little tired."

"I see." Kanbara moved her feet, swivelling my favourite chair back and forth. "I can leave if it's a problem."

"No, not at all," I said. I was lying on my back on my bed, looking up at the ceiling with my hair sprawled out beneath me. "I just need to rest my head a little. Sorry for being so boring."

"I don't have anything to do, so it's fine." Kanbara sighed. "It's surprisingly boring, isn't it? Without the mahjong club."

I nodded absently. I just can't get up the energy to do anything.

Kanbara chuckled. "Missing Miura-senpai?"

"Mm." I snorted softly. "I guess I don't look very cool."

"It's normal, I think."

"She hasn't called," I said suddenly. "And hasn't taken my calls, either."

"That's not a good sign, isn't it?" Kanbara said. "Though it's possible she's busy with university, you'd think she'd have found the time at some point."

"That's what I thought. I'm glad it isn't just me." I sighed, pulling out my phone and idly checking for messages. "Have I been dumped, I wonder?"

Kanbara looked at a loss for a moment. "Well, it hasn't been that long, has it? There's still time."

"It's odd," I said, swallowing uncomfortably. I rubbed my forehead with my other hand. "It feels like if that was the case, she'd say just that. I guess I'm worrying too much."

"Maybe so," Kanbara said. "But it's not weird for you to worry. Miura-senpai left you hanging like this."

I nodded. "You're right... you're right." I sat up, frowning. "It's unfair of her. Even if she's busy, she should at least send me a message telling me that much."

"So forget about her for now," Kanbara said. "It's just the two of us, and I'm not her, but I'll try to entertain you. So don't mope, okay?"

"Maybe I should," I said dubiously. "Thanks, Kanbara. I appreciate it."

"Wahaha. This is what a friend does."

"But I miss her, though." I slid my legs over the bed, placing them on the floor. "Maybe I should go see her."

"I don't think that would be a good idea," Kanbara said cautiously. "You don't have to go that far out of your way..."

"I want to, though." I pushed my hair back out of my eyes. "I do miss her. And I've always left everything to her. Maybe I should to do something for once."

"This is just me, but I think you've been doing pleanty," Kanbara said.

"Not at all. I rely on Maiko's lead for everything. It's a little pathetic." I looked down at the floor. "I guess I shouldn't complain, though. It's silly of me."

Kanbara slid my chair forwards, slapping my shoulders hard. "Yes, yes. No self-pity, okay? You're cooler when you smile."

_Kanbara's a good person, and a canny one. She's my best friend, and I don't think I've ever regretted taking her advice. But I do have less pleasant memories of times when I ignored her advice, and things turned out for the worse because of that. This was one of those times. _

I was in an unfamiliar place, surrounded by people a lot older than me. I wasn't sure where I was going and I wasn't sure whether I should be here at all. It was really uncomfortable. But I forced myself onwards. I didn't have to be apprehensive. I had reason to do this. In the first place, too, she should be happy rather than anything else. I'd even brought her a present. If I couldn't warn her I was coming, well, that wasn't my fault.

I knew where to look, if it was a Sunday. I stopped outside the mahjong club, looking cautiously through the window. It's big. Really big. Just like I thought, Maiko was there, as well. I frowned, irritation flashing through me. If she has enough time to play mahjong, she at least should have time to call me. Anger and fear. I tried to ignore my thousands of imagined doubts.

She looked up at me suddenly. I couldn't read her expression, but I was certain she'd made eye contact with me. I looked away abruptly, feeling incredibly self-conscious. She's always that way.

She didn't come out straight away, though. I ended up waiting for twenty-five minutes before she came out, her hands in the pockets of her jeans. Just seeing her face-to-face made my heart leap and twist uncomfortably. I slid my left hand into the pocket of my jacket, feeling the small box of chocolates I'd brought. "Um-"

"What are you doing here?" Maiko asked, quietly but firmly. She was smiling, but she didn't look happy. I know that face, her fake smile.

"It's been two weeks," I said. "I was worried."

"You're stubborn." Maiko stepped forwards. "We can talk in my room."

"Okay." I frowned. I breathed out slowly as I followed her, my stomach gripped by something like pain. But I was angry, too, and afraid. Those emotions were getting more intense, making it unpleasant just to be in my own skin. It's not as if I couldn't read the mood.

"I'm sorry, I should have called you," Maiko said, her voice more cheerful than before. "I've been rushed off my feet, between studying and mahjong."

"You should have called me, once. Or answered my calls. Or messaged me. Something. Anything." I bit my lip, my eyes heavy. I blinked rapidly, trying to control myself. "I was worried, you know. I really wondered if something had happened..."

"That's pretty unlikely. You're not unintelligent, Yumi." Maiko glanced back at me. "I didn't expect you to come here. Not just anyone could do that."

"I'm stubborn, so you'll have to be straight-forwards," I said. "From the start, you've been like that, after all."

"That's true," Maiko said. "But you weren't always this stubborn." We didn't say anything more until she'd let me into her room. "Sit down. Do you want something to drink?"

"No, that's fine," I said briefly.

Maiko sat on the other chair in the room, looking at me evenly. As ever, there was a slight smile on her lips that didn't quite meet her piercing eyes. "Right. In any case, I wouldn't say that I was ignoring you. It's just I was busy."

"I don't think so," I said. "Before, you'd reproach me for much less. We're going out, so we have obligations to each other. You said that."

"That was before. That was different. I'm not fond of them, long-distance relationships." Maiko closed her eyes. "Honestly, all that's meaningless now."

I gritted my teeth, my breath coming fast. There are too many words to say, and too much emotion. I absolutely don't want to cry. That's the least thing I want to do now, because somehow this has stopped being about each other and started being about our pride. Maiko has so much pride. And even I, so pathetic, so dependent, even I have some pride. "That's just what you think. I wasn't told that. Why didn't you say that much before? If you'd said it clearly, even I'd get it!"

Maiko opened her eyes, holding my gaze without blinking. She frowned. "You'd have made a mess. It's as if I thought of that parting as the end. I have holidays. I can see you then. But right now... no."

"Just what kind of relationship could we possibly have, like that?" I said, standing up and glaring at her. "Maybe I could have done that, if you asked, but-"

"Plans change. People change. Even I make mistakes." Maiko pushed her glasses up her nose. "There's someone here I like. That's all."

"You're so calm," I said, the first thing that came into my head. "You're always so calm! Don't say something like that with that tone! Have you any idea how horrible it is?"

Maiko blinked slowly. "If you want to cry, you can cry. And if you want me to hold you, I can do that. But you shouldn't be so serious. This isn't unusual."

"I'm always serious," I said. "I was always serious, and you know that! You were like that to. I thought so. Shouldn't you be apologising?"

"I could. But I'm tired. I hate useless arguments, too." Maiko stood as well. Her expression was still neutral, her tone low and serene. "You wouldn't believe me even if I apologised. Your reasons aren't mistaken, either. But it's not as if I wasn't serious. That's all in the past, though."

I rubbed my eyes, trying to hold myself back. Was she always this cold? This demonic? "I never did anything wrong," I said, closing my eyes. My voice was beginning to break. "I went along with whatever you said. I've ignored my parents, too. I've done my best with mahjong. Maybe we fought, but I always felt guilty, and I always tried my best to make it up to you..."

Maiko's hand touched my forehead. She sighed as I flinched away. "People make mistakes. Things begin and things end. I'm not going to argue with you about who is to blame. There's no meaning in that."

I gritted my teeth as anger flared through me. "That's just your convenience! I'm not in the wrong here! At the least, I can make you admit that much. So don't talk about this as if we're both to blame!"

Maiko placed her hands on my shoulders, moving her face close to mine. "You're so earnest it hurts. I loved that side of you."

"Don't touch me!" I shoved her away, panting for breath. It's just horrible, touching her now.

Just for a moment, I thought she looked hurt, but that vanished in an instant, so fast I wasn't sure if it wasn't simply my wishful imagination. And then there was just her blank face and narrowed eyes. "Stay here until you've calmed down. I imagine you can make your own way home."

I hated all of it, all of a sudden. All of the contrived, artificial smiles. All of the calculation, the forcefulness, the hypocrisy. That arrogance, an arrogance so strong she'd never admit she'd done a single thing wrong, that she'd never acknowledge other people at all. It was poisonous, and it tainted everything. She was so much a part of me, I'd believed in her with that much passion, and now that was all so much mud.

"Honestly, it's not as if I hate you, Yumi," Maiko said, opening the door. "But it's okay if you hate me for now."

"I don't need your permission!" I screamed.

The door closed behind me. I collapsed back into the chair behind me, and began to cry. It hurt. It just... hurt.

_With the benefit of hindsight, what can I say? Maybe it was inevitable. I was naïve. Perhaps I should have taken the obvious hints from the start. But Maiko should certainly have been honest. To this day, that's something I don't understand. She's something who can say outrageous things. She can lie, she can tell the truth. But she didn't take my calls, maintain a pretence, act as if things were the same as before. And she didn't dump me formally, either. What she did was cowardly and weak. If it was someone else, maybe, you'd understand to an extent. But since it was Maiko, I didn't understand. I still don't. Maybe even she's bad at breaking off relationships. All that's my intellect speaking, though. I atomise things, I try to understand them. It's what I do. But those emotions I felt then aren't rational. To this day, thinking about it is still painful. Betrayal... it wasn't just destroying out future. It forced me to reconsider everything, from the very first day, in a far worse light. And even more than that, I felt stupid. The happiest of experiences made me feel violated in retrospect. But life goes on. I decided I wouldn't lose to all of that._

Kanbara ran towards me as I approached the school. "Yumi-chin, good morning!" she said, trying to sound cheerful. But she looked worried.

"Good morning," I replied, doing my best to sound casual. I swallowed uncomfortably.

"You cut your hair," Kanbara said. "It's a little cool, actually."

"Thanks." That made me smile, despite myself. I wanted to smile. "I'm going to do my best. At mahjong, too. Even if we don't have four players, I'll still do everything I can."

"Wahaha. At this rate, you'll overtake me. I'll do what I can as well, though." Kanbara turned back towards the school, looking relieved. "But first we have lessons, so worry about that first."

I nodded weakly. "Ah." She hadn't asked anything, even after the days I missed without saying a thing. "Sorry to worry you, Kanbara."

"I knew you'd be fine," Kanbara said airily. "Since you're strong, Yumi-chin, just like me."

"That's right," I said, forcing a smile.

_They say time heals all wounds, and they aren't wrong. But you remember lessons learned. I decided that I'd never experience that again. I'd never make anyone else feel that way, either. I wouldn't let Kanbara worry about me. And one more thing. I'd overcome my weaker side. I'd play the mahjong I loved, and that had nothing to do with Maiko._


	17. Chapter 17

**Yumi: Part 17, Kindness**

I've started playing a little mahjong, enough to cringe at past mistakes. But that's gone, now is all there is! I lucked into houdei raoyui in my second game, but sadly I have no special powers.

**

* * *

**

"Well, that's it." Yumi-senpai smiled. "I suppose you could call it an ordinary story. Even though I'm not fond of it, somehow, it wasn't bad to tell it to you, Momo."

I nodded cautiously, feeling strange. "Thanks."

"No, I'm the one who should say that. Thank you for listening." Yumi-senpai held my gaze briefly, blushing slightly, before looking away. "It's probably for the best, after all. This is it for that story. I'm going to leave it here with you, and go to university without regrets. Even if Maiko's there, that doesn't matter. I don't have to be afraid of her."

I nodded. "Is she really that scary, though? It's a little difficult for me to imagine."

"It's not easy for me to explain, either." Yumi-senpai sighed. "But yeah, I don't trust Maiko. I don't trust myself around her, either. For all that, I'll still be fine."

I frowned thoughtfully. "I see. I guess I can understand to an extent. When I think about it, how we met is pretty similar, right? You bringing me into the mahjong club."

Yumi-senpai flushed, wincing. "That was a little different... I'm rather less smooth than Maiko."

"I still felt it was amazing, though," I said cheerfully. "You struck me as an amazingly confident person."

"That was the courage born of desperation," Yumi-senpai said, looking thoroughly embarrassed. "I'm sure you're classmates remember me for that, and not in a good way."

"I think they've all forgotten by now. But I haven't, and I still think it was amazing," I said. "I really am grateful, Yumi-senpai. Thanks to you, I've managed to change a little. I've made important friends, too."

"It's nothing. I had a great time, too." Yumi-senpai sighed, smiling wanly. "We really are at this point, aren't we? Looking at our experiences together as a whole, since they're about to end."

I blinked. "That wasn't exactly what I meant. It just reminded me..."

"I guess so. I shouldn't be melancholy." Yumi-senpai finished off her drink. "Well, we've all done our best. I wish I could say I don't have any regrets, but I can't. But it was fun."

"What do you regret?" I asked curiously. "Us not reaching the nationals?"

Yumi smiled. "A little. But that wasn't what I was thinking about." She looked at me. "Shall we go? I've kept you a long time."

I shook my head. "There's no rush. You know what my family's like."

"Even if you say that, I feel guilty. I should be more responsible." Yumi-senpai smiled. "Though being responsible is really tiring. I guess I'll be irresponsible one more time."

"Mm." Just a little longer. Honestly, that kind of feeling is grinding me down. Nothing has thrown my fondness for Yumi-senpai into sharper relief than the fact that we're out of time. "Um. Can I ask something strange?"

"Go ahead. If it's you, Momo, anything is fine," Yumi-senpai said.

"What did it feel like, liking someone that much?" I said, feeling awkward. Maybe this wasn't a good idea, but I was curious. "It's hard to explain, but even if know the events I'm wondering about your feelings."

Yumi-senpai nodded. "I suppose so. That's the hardest thing to describe." She frowned. "Do you find it weird? The fact I felt that way about another girl."

"Not really. I mean, it's not as if I can't imagine something like that," I said, blushing. "Um. I can't really say it very well, but you're just you. It's weird but I'm a weird person myself, so... I mean, socially speaking, we're weird. But that's different from what we think. Or at least, I think."

"I wasn't trying to trap you or test you or anything. You don't have to be flustered." Yumi-senpai closed her eyes. "Maybe I should have told you about this before. I was always afraid I'd be badly regarded... I have my mother's example springing to mind, after all."

"I like to think I'm a little more understanding than her," I said, pouting.

"That's certainly true. In any case, it was very strange." Yumi-senpai shrugged. "What I wanted most of all was change. I wasn't entirely happy with my current self. I hate being bad at things and I wasn't very good at talking to people, so in the end I turned that into a point of pride because it made me feel less bad about myself. And Maiko was very different, which I admired. Maybe all I was doing was entrusting my desire to change to someone else... the idea that she could change me. I wonder whether that was a good idea."

"I understand that, since I was very similar. You always struck me as very different from that, though," I said.

"I'm not who I was three years ago. I'm not perfect but I've progressed. I've tried to encourage you three in different ways, insofar as I can. Anyway, all of this is an aside." Yumi-senpai shrugged. "I wanted her to be kind to me. I've mentioned this before, but it was really extreme, in terms of highs and lows. Being around her was somehow more intense than being anywhere else, and it was enjoyable in itself, but also somehow tiring. More and more, I didn't feel natural around her."

"I see," I said thoughtfully. "Mm. Sorry to ask about something like that, but it made me curious."

"Not at all. If you're asking me questions, it makes me feel less self-indulgent," Yumi-senpai said.

A little different, then. I've never felt uncomfortable around Yumi-senpai. With her, more than anyone else, I feel I can be my natural self, even if I've made mistakes. I want to be able to thank her for that, but I can't, not overtly. "I'm one who feels selfish right now," I said awkwardly. "Hearing about her... well... I suppose I hate her. I don't know whether that's good or not."

"Well, I'm happy that you're upset on my behalf. I was fishing for a little sympathy, as well." Yumi-senpai reached out, touching my head affectionately. "I'm fine now. Don't worry about her."

I closed one eye, blushing slightly as her fingers brushed over my hair. "I'm angry, not worried. It sounds like she was a bad person."

"I think Kanbara feels the same way. Maybe I should be more angry than I am."

Honestly, that's not what I meant. I hate her for that, but I also hate her because she was someone my beloved senpai loved. That makes me feel really selfish, in a way. "No, you're right," I said, trying to sound cheerful. "It's best that you just forget about her."

"Right." Yumi-senpai glanced at me. "I've never been like that, have I? For long time now I was worried I'd end up doing that to you."

"You're completely different from her," I said. Yes, this was a chance. Maybe I could say it now. "You're always kind, so there's no way I could have any reason to hate you." I guess that's a start.

"That's reassuring. The situation felt similar to me." Yumi-senpai closed her eyes, looking away. "I guess I should trust myself a little more."

"Exactly! Whether you're confident or sincere but worried like this, I like you, senpai," I said, leaning forwards slightly on my seat. My heart's beating too fast. "But I think I like you most when you're looking straight ahead."

"Thank you," Yumi-senpai said, looking surprised. "That's flattering."

I breathed out slightly. I guess I know what she means about this kind of situation being tiring. Just a little. "It's nothing. If you ever feel down, I'll do something about it. Even if you're far away. You can do the same for me, right?"

"Of course. I just wish I could do it right here. But that's how life works." Yumi-senpai was going to say something more, but she was interrupted by her mobile ringing. "Sorry. Give me a second." She pulled out her phone, answering. "Hello?" She paused for a few seconds. "Sorry, I lost track of time... I'm still in town. I'm sorry."

This went on for a while. It looked like she was being scolded again. Senpai's older than I am, and I consider myself old enough to stay out later than this. But if it's her mother, it can't be helped.

In the end, Yumi rang off and sighed. "Well, it looks like I have to get back."

I nodded. "Okay. Let's go back to the station together."

I touched her arm again with my free arm when we left the café. I've never been very good with words. But since normal people can't see me at times like this, I've always been able to do this without fear. I guess it's my way of expressing myself.

Yumi-senpai glanced at me for a long moment as we walked, before looking away. "There's one more thing I'd like to tell you, if I could. But not now. Even if that's being unfair of me, not now."

"About Miura-san?" I said.

"Next time. I'm only saying this now so I can't back out of it somehow. I know what I'm like." Yumi-senpai looked up, keeping pace with me as we walked together through the street. "Next time we meet face to face like this, be sure to ask me what it was I didn't tell you today."

"Okay," I said, feeling confused. "I will."

"Thanks." Yumi-senpai was silent for a few seconds. "In any case, I'm leaving the club to you, as well. Mutsuki will be a fine president, but you can't leave anything to the president. Everyone needs to work together."

I nodded, smiling. "I'll do my best. And if it's me, I won't do what you did to poor Kanbara-senpai and overshadow her."

"I never overshadowed Kanbara," Yumi-senpai protested. "I just gained a reputation due to that incident."

"Everyone in my class thought you were the president, until I corrected them," I said cheerfully. "It's always been that way."

"I feel sorry for Kanbara," Yumi-senpai said. "She worked hard, as well."

"I know that. I think she likes things the way they are, though," I said.

Yumi-senpai smiled. "I suppose so. Well, I won't say anything more. About mahjong, either."

"That's what we normally talk about, though," I said playfully.

"Is that a bad thing?"

"Not at all. I like it, after all. Shall we play each other again tonight?"

"That's a good idea," Yumi-senpai said. "As usual, I won't go easy on you. I need to prepare for Todai."

"I doubt I'll help with that," I said. "Maybe we should bring in Kaori. Her mahjong isn't useless online, like mine is."

"What are you talking about? Online or off, with or without stealth, you're mahjong's strong." Yumi-senpai gave me an encouraging smile. "It's always been that way."

I smiled back. "I've still got a long way to go. Both of us have, right?"

"That's certainly true. But that's what makes it interesting. I'm sure it's really lonely at the top of the world, whoever stands there." Yumi-senpai smirked. "Though even if I say that, I want to be there. However impossible a dream it might be. You should come too."

"I'll see what I can do."

She's totally different from Miura-san. I know that without even meeting the latter. It's that kind senpai I'm very fond of and I'm afraid to part from.


End file.
